You are an amazing writer. This story, plot, character development, your use of words, it's just perfect.

The only thing I can say in criticism is that it is a damn
shame you have written very few stories. With this talent you should write 10 more Zorro stories...That would make me very happy lol

I must have missed something, or perhaps this is just a mistake?

"Ah, here you are Felipe," Diego said. He turned and nodded at Victoria. "I am afraid, **Senora**, that I do not have the time to visit today, no matter how tempting the company."

Diego referred to Victoria as a SENORA. Is he just tired, or what?

Oh good you are exploring Alejandro’s character, and I’m curious what role Hinojosa will play in this story.

Another great chapter. I’m curious to see what happens with Felipe and Olivia.

I’m usually at another fandom and I thought I would give Zorro fan fic a try. I saw this rec at someone site, so far great first chapter.

I loved this story it made my laugh, it made me cry, shake my head at Diego and stay up way to late reading it. Please continue I love how this story turned out. You did a wonderful job of allowing Diego and Alejandro to come to an understanding but even more so Deigo and Victoria. I hope that you do right a sequl for a love to read a story that makes me laugh, cry and forget about my troubles if only for a bit.

Finally done reading your story!
I have to tell you, when I was done i really went: "what the hell does the title mean??" Well, I finally googgled it, thinking it must be an expression I didn't know about, and there I found it, a rhyme about Humpty Dumpty. You will have to forgive my ignorance in the area (not being a native English speaker at all!) but what is the underlying meaning to it? I would like to hear from you instead of listing my inapt guesses at this cultural reference :)

So, thinking back on your whole story, I'd say my favorite things about it were:
1- Alejandro and his characterization, and how he became more and more prominent as the story progressed. Really a nice treat to have many chapters from his POV
2- The almost absent Victoria, which to me is a new take on NWZ, as most people do use her all the time as the other main character and the "easy source" of drama and angst :)
3- The few chapters with Diego prisoner from Domingo and his men, and the interaction he has with the two dons.

What I liked but think could be improved:
1- Felipe's more prominent role which was also a less often used road in fanfic. However, though the first chapters had really sweet insights, it dragged a little, and like I said in a previous review, Felipe's feelings would require some brush ups to be more consistent between each other. Best chapter with Felipe was with him facing Alejadro.
2- The bandit plot. Domingo, especially, could use some appearances earlier on in the story, and should have been shown with tighter bonds with his men for your last chapter featuring him exclusively to work well.
3- The whole "angst" of your story. It started a little too emotional and angsty to my taste and it took me a while to warm up to your story (first 8-9 chapters, to say the truth) but after you had Diego kidnapped, your story was solidly written, and the emotions were not so "cheap" and "emo" anymore, and more carefully written. You were getting more and more at ease with the characters without tipping in the overly dragging sentimentality of it.

And well.. was there anything I didn't like? This would only be referring to personal taste vs giving you constructive criticism, now, wouldn't it? Personally, and this is why I most often have a hard time reading NWZ, I find Diego to be too perfect. He always thinks the right things, is always proper, never makes a real mistake that has bad consequences and have to live with those consequences, never has the wrong thought... and his only weakness or area where he would need to improve is often depicted as being his stubbornness, but even that is always shown in the context of him having to save the world over saving himself.

Of course, reading your story, I did not expect this Diego to be different, but I always wonder why people love to read or write so much about such a perfect character. I tend to prefer Walt Disney Zorro because he's not the renaissance man like the NWZ version, and he did allow himself to feel jealous and angry on more than one occasion, making him a more believable human in my eyes... but ah, I am ranting about NWZ vs WDZ now ahah. Forgive me. :)

I must admit the one thing that somewhat veered away from this stereotypical NWZ was the realization for Diego of how the pueblo suffered from the alcalde wanting to capture Zorro for so long... though it was muted against Alejandro arguing for him that he was right in doing so, while the pueblo should have fought to defend themselves too instead of relying on Zorro all the time. This I am afraid is another Mary Sue trap into which writers get caught (and I have been caught by that one in the past too!), but it doesn't make your story less enjoyable to me in the end.

Fant

Another great Alejandro POV chapter! The conversation was well handled overall, though I had some trouble following the characters line of thoughts in certain passages. It was nice that Alejandro was trying to keep on that thread of connection with Diego while Diego is still putting on his invisible mask of correctness.
My favorite part is how he argues AGAINST Zorro, very, very clever twist and so different from what most people would write about this duality within Diego.

Hola,

I skipped reviewing a few of your chapters. You have somehow returned to the "angst" of your first chapters since Diego has returned home, though it is handled much better, and with a great chapter putting Felipe and Alejandro in the same room. Alejandro was wonderfully written in this part, I love whenever someone is able to make him more than a supporting character. I also love that Victoria is still not too prominent (as I believe there are enough fics out there about her already lol) and that you still keep your focus on Felipe here and there.

Now, this chapter with Domingo, I found very intriguing. It puzzled me a little, in the sense that it doesn't seem to fit with the rest of your plot buildup. I think I said it before, but you should maybe have incorporated more about Domingo and his buddies early on, to provide more continuity with these characters. Domingo's thoughts are a mystery to me as well. Reading on to see what will happen...

What amazes me is that you always manage to put one sentence in your chapters that I find insightful about the Zorro characters. In this chapter, I really liked this one: "he was robbed of the responsibilities that had acted as a substitute for strength for the last few days".
This scene with De Soto and the de la Vega's men coming in after they rescued Diego was one with a lot of potential to exploit. Alejandro's reaction at finding his son back, the confrontation between the bandits and De Soto who "betrayed" them, Domingo learning about Diego's identity. The only one I found confusing was the reaction at Juan when Diego asked about him. There was something going on between him and Alejandro, but it wasn't really clear in the writing.

oh wow, I find you trying to excuse yourself for you story again in this chapter, explaining the story took another direction and you lost all the tension.
Let me kindly rephrase that for you. Your story started with characters wallowing in what I would call "angst" and this is typically the sort of stuff I do not particularly enjoy reading over multiple chapters. I felt you had nice insights, but the plot was suffering from it for way too long. When you started writing the bandits in, boy, you plot was suddenly interesting, refreshing, action-packed, and all the time, you still presented us with the characters' emotions and reactions to what is happening in the pueblo. We see more of De Soto, we get to learn about his plan, we get an amazing scene with him and Alejandro, a short but key scene with Victoria. I have seriously begun enjoying your story from that point on, because I am the type of person who enjoys westerns and action :)
And what a cliffhanger there, De Soto calls Diego by his name, so Domingo learns he was not so invaluable after all!

short chapter, but its one highlight is how Victoria's grief for Zorro came before her feelings for Diego, and how Alejandro compares his own reactions and feelings towards his son, in the same manner. Very nifty parallel between two characters we do not see together very much.

ehh, love De Soto in this chapter. He seems a very arrogant, intelligent villain. Was he portrayed as such in the tv series? I always found the bad guys to be way too mild in NWZ, but fans do tend to make them more formidable enemies in fics ;)
This Alejandro vs De Soto conversation was very intense and every bit satisfying to me. I see you had a streak of inspiration back in these last few chapters!
one little note: a female "don" is called a "doña", not donna :)

oh yes! Alejandro, finally :)
right there in the opening paragraph, one sentence I liked very much: "for the first time he was sincerely wondering how he could be the father of such a man." This must be so difficult for Alejandro to think this. So intense!
I got a chuckle at his "Three was a very manageable number" and this "Zorro is clearly insane." ahah! Here is the Alejandro I like so much. He brings much needed "humor" in your story too :) It is such a nice thing later on for Alejandro to be denying his fear in favor of anger, anger being much more "useful". This is a very nice characterization done in this chapter! I also liked how he notices Felipe's fierce reaction compared to his usual self :)
I am not familiar at all with De Soto's character, as I haven't seen the last 2 seasons of NWZ, but he seems pretty evil and smart compared to Ramon.

ooh great! the bandits, FINALLY! I really enjoyed reading this chapter, because we are away from the angst and the emotions, and we are jumping into action! In a really funny way you are torturing Diego, putting him inside a cage with the two men that hate Diego and Zorro more than anything else. So hilarious! I wonder where this will lead, this is really a fantastic idea.
I don't really know why you felt this chapter was not satisfactory, in fact I can't see any major flaw in it, nor in the plot. I find it is a refreshing chapter, if nothing else. Nice change in the pacing.