i really don't want to login cause i'm about to get off, but i really like daine/kaddar pairings to get to it. i don't mind much when i have to sift through all kinds of mushy daine/numair srap because in the end i get to read about my favortie pairing for the immortals series!

i love the idea keep it up.

Please update soon! This is very good!

I like your stroy!
PLZ PLZ PLZ update son! I look forward to it!
KEEP DAINE/KADDAR TOGETHER! NUMAIR JUS SCARES ME! HEHE

Me likie. But who will Daine end up with?

its a great story. and i love it. and its so romantic! i have one question: will Numair admitt his feelings to Daine and get crushed?

write more soon, or your humble fan shall grow weak from lack of reading material.

Why are you making them talk like that? It's like you are trying to make them sound all intellectual and yet, you can't. Hello! Think about who this is. It's Daine, for gods sakes. Ya know, lived in back country, raised with bad grammar...Am I ringing any bells? Neither Kaddar nor Daine ever talked like that, stop writing them out of character! (BTW, Spellchecker is a magnificent tool.)
Not trying to be mean but I believe being honest is more important than being polite. Especially in a review such as this.
Later...

He got up and walked off quickly and little did Daine know that as he left tears leaked down his cheeks feeling like hot acid running down his dark cheeks
What the hell is that? You SUCK at writing. How old are you, 8? You couldn't be older than 10...
If you are then I must draw the conclusion that you are immensely stupid or semi-retarded.
Please learn how to write before writing anything else...I beg you!

Ok, I am sorry but that really...wasn't good. They are falling in love WAY to fast. It should be much more gradual and fun. And a secret love affair would be fun!
Also I think they say they love eachother way to much. It doesn't work like that. Anyway, I still like the whole Daine/Kaddar thing.
Later!

Do you read over your chapters when you finish typing them? Maybe you should have someone else edit them for you. Don't get me wrong; the story is great, but the writing needs improvement.

i enjoyed your fanfic and was wondering if you could email me when it has been updated...thank you
~k~

Good so far, typos and all that, no biggie.
I think Ozorne should interfere, yell at Daine, put the whole situation in jeopardy. Then they should declare war. Daine and Kaddar run away together and call on Weiryn to help them by summoning the powers of The Realms of the Gods and the animals of Tortall and TP's world.
Dunno, random ideas plopped together.
MORE SOON PLEASE

Coupla typos last and here, nothin serious
Right, Diane does have an accent
And Kaddar would never say "Mithros, Daine." He's a Carthaki after all. :)
Keep truckin'!

Well, here;s a review:
Moremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremoremore!
UPDATE SOON PLEASE

Well, here's one of those annoying harrasing emails.
UPDATE!