cool please contiue lol

Good story so far! Why haven't you continued?

this was a very cool chapter i hope you write the next chapter as fast as you both can and want.

Nani? Well, it's alright so far, but I think you should make it a bit more original of something. Just a bit 'tis all I ask.

Nice Story! Keep it up!

Hm I see its one of those "Suck Into a Realm type" stories. Heh! Nice! Keep at it! And don't get lazy like i have!

So far not too bad, aside from being incredibly unoriginal. Better written than many stories of this type, for what THAT is worth.