That was so sad! I actually cried at the end of it. Great job.

God... I still have goosebumps after reading this thing. Very well written, escpecially since it's about the Dragonslayers. God, I wish Van died then and there, that . Yeah, I hated Van for what he did to the dragonslayers. No justice in the world, ne?

:O
that was really good, i'm tired but i had to finish and give you a review. I love Dilandau but i like van and hitomi too *playfully sticks huffs* this was too good. well done!

wow that was good!I'm crying, but it has to be the best version of that i have ever read! It's so good!
Ja ne,
Angel Of Re.

Wow. That was utterly INCREDIBLE! Wow. You made each of the Dragonslayers personalities so VIVID. Thye just came...alive. Ironically. Heh.
Brilliant touch of humor and angst. I was actually enjoying the DS last battle, because their spirits were there.
Plus, you made this entirely completely believable. This could so easily have happened in the series! Wow!
The ending...perfectly eloquent. This is...amazing. *stares* My cap is off to you.

Please don't take this as anything but constructive criticism, but Self-Insert fics (where the author is a character of or takes an active role in the story) have a fatal flaw:

They are written solely as author wish fulfillment. A SI author writes only to please and entertain themself, and therefore runs the risk of entertaining only themself.

Note this isn't about you personally, but it is a common problem among budding fanfiction authors.

At any rate, I have only a few other nit-picky things I noticed. Shinimegami/Shinigami are Japanese-named god/desses, so why do they report to a Greek god Zeus? Also, why are pronouns almost never used for them? It must be as much of a pain to type their full names all the time as it is to read them.

Also, the rapid viewpoint shifts -- and perspective; stick with one please -- were sometimes confusing and discouraging to the reader. Your verb tense seemed to change constantly too.

All in all, other than the SI, this was a mostly decent fanfic only marred by a few grammatical/mechanical errors. I liked the notion of the Dragonslayers choosing to die for Dilandau.

Keep writing. The more you write, the better youbecome.

*sniff* That was sad. Very clever, though. ^_^ I thought at first this was just going to be a "Save the Dragonslayers" fic. But you did a nice twist when they chose to fight, even knowing they were going to die. You really captured their feelings of loyalty and courage there. It was much more effective than just having them live koz-the-author-wanted-them-to. I also liked the way the reality was slightly changed. They really did sacrifice themselves for Dilandau. *sniff* That was sweet.

As for the constructive part of this review... The only thing I didn't like was the constantly changing POVs. It made it kind of confusing, even if it did give the reader a clearer picture of what was going on inside their head. I think you could have accomplished the same thing using a third person narrative and just italicizing thoughts.

Anyway, very good story. I like one-shots. ^_^