HOLY **! THIS IS THE COOLEST POKEMON STORY I'VE READ!

...wow. That was, beyond a shadow of a doubt, one of the best Pokemon fics I have ever read. If and when Ash ever does make it to the Master level, I hope it's just like that.

The battles were excellently-written and actually very exciting; that's really saying something for me, since I'm usually the type of person who loathes reading about battles. But since I could so clearly see them happening on the show, it was incredibly enjoyable.

Everyone was very in-character, and I could definitely see Ash losing control in his desire to win. David Ketchum's appearance was a very good twist; it's nice to see a fic where Ash's father is neither Professor Oak nor apparently nonexistent.

Again, great work with the realism. I like AU's and pointless one-shots as much as the next person (hell, I think I'm the queen of pointless fics...), but sometimes it's nice just to read a great fic in the vein of the show.

Bravo.

--Anysia

Great story overall! Hope there will be another one about this universe.

love it love it loveit. great story. once again i shall say loved it

ALL HAIL THE KING OF WHOOPASS!


I gotta see how he ends up.

More 'fictional' Pokemon... Not good. I prefer stories that stick to canon [i.e. official data] more... But then again, fanfiction is not canon is it now?

I wonder, what is the 'magical' criteria for Charizard evolution...

Since you have introduced one new evolution, you may as well introduce more. Starting with the starters; we can't have an unbalanced chain, now can we?

love the story. cant wait to read what u have in store for Charizard. oh well looks like ill have to wait for the next chapter.lol.

Great! Charizard evolving? Man I thought you were gonna make him do something like do a suicide attack. But then again with 5 Pokemon including his Metagross for David, and only 2 for Ash that would be a little stupid. And I don't think Dexter would have info on charizard's evolved form since Prof. Oak said it was a like a story, so it would be strange if Charizard's evolved form was in the Pokedex. Oh well, that just my opinion.

great story, cant wait for the rest. i love it !

Great story! Plez update soon. In your summary you might wanna put that there is some romance. Oh well, it's your choice. I know it'll be hard updating and stuff with school on now, I should know. What I mean is that updating daily or weekly is not easy, and that I should know because I'm making 2 of my own stories.

I am glad to say - You have improved a lot since Pokemon: Origins.

This story, as whole, is excellent!

To get to this chapter:

Ash's father is more or less as expected - obsessed.

This was nice, but Tyranitar shouldn't be affected by Electric attacks... Nevermind though, maybe it has something to do with where it is targeted.

David Ketchum is a real surprise... Unexpected, like the Mew!

Hm i like Evil Ash stories dont know why but i do and i hope he wins so update as soon as you can bye bye

Many water Pokemon know Ice-type attacks...

Doesn't Ash know that Dragons are resistant to most special attacks?

The Mew was... really unexpected. But why untransform? Crawdaunt, as a Water/Dark, is more than capable for resisting Psychic attacks... Unless transform doesn't copy type. Unless I'm mistaken, Ash did get a Corphish in AG... But he definitely had a Carvahna.

Why is it revolving around Charizard now?

Anyway, the plot thickens... Could never have guessed it from Chapter 1