Reviews for Breaking Down - FanFiction.Net

Reviews For: Breaking Down - Reviews: Page 1 of 2

Perri Smith 2003-09-20 ch 23,	abuseExcellent, as always. Your handling of Zoey and Charlie -- particularly charlie -- was dead on the nose, but you balanced the angst of the threats, and Toby and Andi's relationship, with the silliness of Sam and Steve (who aren't getting any less "cute" themselves), the cuteness of the President, and the focus of Josh on his crusade (he and Donna will never stop amusing me). Plus, the whole CJ and Danny thing running perfectly right down the middle. Wonderful characterization all around, your dialogue continues to rock, you've got a great touch for writing the relationships, and I can't wait for the next one!
Jesper 2003-09-18 ch 23,	abuseDUDE! Another cliffhanger? DUDE!?! hehehe I don't know if I can wait for another installment. Alas I will cause it's fun. Awesome story!! The interaction between the characters is witty, funny, Sorkinesque (but I gotta say better than Mr. S :D)and the story is so enthraling was hard to pull myself away from the puter. Someone else in the reviews said they liked the way you balanced the different story lines and I have to second that. Your story flows from scene to scene and story to story effortlessly and the reader isn't left confsued. Thanks for a great read Nomad. :)
Kim The Manipaltive Little ... 2003-09-17 ch 23,	abuseWoot! I can't wait for your next story. Just think, if the new season sucks, fanfic addicts will always have Nomad who is better then Sorkin and not a sell out!
BenRG 2003-09-17 ch 23,	abuseWah! Another cliffhanger! Oh well, it comes at the right place and makes me want to keep reading ;-) I am enjoying the places that you are taking this story and I eagerly await the revelations to come. BenRG's Overall Rating: 7/10
BenRG 2003-09-15 ch 22,	abuse:o Naughty, naughty boy, Mr. Hoynes (for I assume that he is the one dropped right in it). Sniffles I hate sad endings, but Andi is right. No matter how much she and Toby love each other, Toby is just simply too... frigid... to give her what she needs: Continual Jed-and-Abbey-style love & affection. Even so... sniffle It is sad when it ends like that. BenRG's Rating: 7/10
Anjali Organna 2003-09-14 ch 21, anon.	abuseI love the way you juggle multiple storylines--you always manage to keep on top of things, and I as a reader never feel overwhelmed. As someone who also loves TWW for the dialogue, your own is great to read. Keep up the good work!
BenRG 2003-09-14 ch 21,	abuseI loved that conversation between Charlie and Leo. I could hear the two actors from the series saying the lines. That is how well-written this chapter was. BenRG's Rating: 8/10
BenRG 2003-09-13 ch 20,	abuseYee-argh! You had to put the cliffie /there/ didn't you? Okay, now you've got me dangling on the line. Toby/Andi seems to be turning into something of a tragedy. However, I do think I know what Toby is trying to say: He isn't a young man who wants to be a father. He is a middle-aged man who realises that he is in love and everything else doesn't matter enough to affect his opinion of Andi. Maybe Leo can help Charlie. "Punch in a wall; Take up kick-boxing; Write nasty letters to the /Post/. Just don't let it get all bottled up inside." BenRG's Rating: 7/10
BenRG 2003-09-12 ch 19,	abuseThis is growing increasingly interesting without being frantic. I have latched onto the Toby/Andi dynamic right now, but the whole story is full of interesting matters. This is an interesting alternate universe to enjoy and I hope that we will see more of it. BenRG's Rating: 7/10
BenRG 2003-09-10 ch 17,	abuseIt looks like Leo is going to have one of /those/ days, doesn't it? Stoned Jed is always a bad thing. I guess we should just be glad that there wasn't any kind of crisis that night. Oh, I just wanted to express my appreciation for this line: '"Thanks, but- I'm on a secretarial wage. If I was to have cat food in my house, it's not entirely outside the realms of possibility that I would end up eating it."' As a fellow secretarial wage slave, I hear you, brother. I hear you... BenRG's Rating: 7/10
BenRG 2003-09-08 ch 15,	abuseWow! That scene with Toby and Andi actually brought tears to my eyes. It was /so/ well written and is the highlight of this 'book' so far. Toby really loves Andi. He loves her so much that I think he is willing to be unhappy for the rest of his life if it will help her. Poor stoned Jed. Remember that episode when the same thing happened? "Toby, Toby, Toby... That is such a great name isn't it?" BenRG's Rating: 8/10
BenRG 2003-09-06 ch 13,	abuseNot much to say on this chapter, although it was of your usual high quality. Only this: "Josh, does it bother you that your assistant has considerably more influence in this building than you do?" "It used to. But then Donna told me to stop worrying about it, so I did." XD BenRG's Rating: 7/10
BenRG 2003-09-05 ch 12,	abuseHm... I'm going to stick my neck out and suggest that Donna is (inadvertantly) the leak. We've seen before how easily she can be manipulated into letting something slip if she can be persuaded that it is for the greater good. The question is 'why?' Is Jed really sick? Well, he has MS, but with everything that you've put him through in the last few months, I wouldn't be surprised if he had come down with stress-induced pneumonia. :-p
BenRG 2003-09-03 ch 10,	abuseYay! The Nomad is back, and with a story that has the quality that I expect from a 'Further to Fly' story. :-D Okay, first all the uppers: The characters are all excellently realised and you have managed to create a very self-consistent AU. The downers... I guess I'm tired of /yet another/ threat to Charlie or somehow connected to him. I know that there are crazies in America who would take the President's daughter marrying a black as a kind of blasphemy but the repetitino drags a little. That aside, I'm enjoying this story a lot. I really enjoy how you write the show's characteristic banter, especially that between Josh and Donna and that between Jed and Abbey. BenRG's Rating: 7/10
Katie 2003-08-30 ch 5, anon.	abuseExcellent as always, eagerly awaiting more!

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