Intriguing. Very intriguing.

It's perfect. I can think of nothing else to say.

Well, when will mearly being Captain Jack Sparrow not be enough?

Nice one, I like the mixture of vanity and irony and a little bit of contact to reality. That last sentence keeps it from being funny and not more than that.

Very nice. I like the use of "you", to bring us right into the story. And I love the last sentence.