WOW that was awesome. Please send me some to my email, U should become a professional writer

Wow that is an awesome beginning. but in the last paragraph for the first part, yuo should say " Just before the humas were out of her view, Rajani ran after them and cautiously followed".

lol...i didnt even think of harry potter until you mentioned it...nice chappy! ^_^

This is good!! Write more soon please. I really want to see where it's going.

This is good!! Write more soon please. I really want to see where it's going.

awesome chappy, especially thanx to the d/n fluffies! every fic could use more of that! ^_^

nice, very nice...george is such a spoiler! I hope you update soon! ^_^

very good i loved it! probably the best one on here ive read so far

that sure answered some questions...i liked it! ^_^

this is really good! the writing is a lot smoother to read now too. (not that it wasnt before, just more so now.)

((my computer is down and i'm on a different one right now, so for a while my reviews will probably be a bit spaced out.))

Aw, poor Kalita. She's so sad... Is she gonna tell Numair what happened? Please update soon!

poor kalita...r u gonna reveal what makes her so upset?

You were wirting this chapter in mostly past tence. Past tence is if you write 'she walked over to the tree and sat down' and present tence is where you write 'She waslks over to the tree and sits down.'

This was a cool chapter! I feel sorry for Jasmine... Please write more soon!

that still isn't what i meant by past tense, but i'll stop buggin, you about it.
i've just had it drilled into my head in my english class for as long as i can remember, but it's really not the end of the world, or worse, the rebellion of the space monkeys*cringes*

this is a wonderful story and constant upates even though school is in are wonderful.

I like your story, bu I have to agree with the others that your mixing of tenses makes it hard to read. The past tense means writing about things that have finished eg 'Numair walked' - he has finished walking, so his action is in the past. This is what you naturally seem to write most of the time, but somtimes you put in the present tense, eg 'Numair is walking,' ie he is still moving. In writing, you could use either, but generally stick to one throughout a piece. eg "Jasmine growled and lies down" is past (growled) and present (lies down). To be grammatically correct, you could say growls and lies down, or growled and lay down (although the latter is better for your own story). I hope this helps clear things up for you; apart from that, your story is really great. I will look forward to reading the rest... :o)