Very interesting so far. Though, if I may hazard a suggestion? A little more 'meat' to the story might be a benifit. The dialogue is wonderful, but it's difficult to make a story work based soley on that - but you've got a wonderful start going for you! Good work thus far! I look forward to future installments.

apart from the story being too run together and I missed where her family showed up, it is an interesting start. I like all the dialogue. Please don't make your character a Mary Sue.