That was great!

Nice story ^_^ and i'm glad you're a real LOTF fan, and not only english-assignment posters ;)

Oh, hey. I didn't know you read LOTF too (initially I'd only read your LJ fic)...this is rather well written; I like the descriptive writing. Admittedly though, it's not your best work...but nice all the same.

The repetition of : "What have you been doing? Having a war or something?" is fitting. I wanted to choke the guy in the book when he said that.

Brilliant dearheart, absolutely brilliant.

I think you really captured the idea at the very end there, and it made the story all the more powerful for the ending. I agree with you that Golding might have made this very same statement, and I think you did a good job catching his style.

The thoughts with the dashes in front of them are a very nice way of capturing thoughts that Golding did not do, and I like it muchly. It adds to the story to see what Ralph is thinking, as he's the one that it's about..sort of.

I especially like the scene where Jack and Ralph are talking...It's very nice. It's good to see evil and good talk once in a while. Although, Ralph isn't good himself, really. He's about as good as humankind gets, but he's no saint. That was Simon's role. You used some intense ideas in that part, though, and it made it one of my favorite parts.

Glad you wrote this, and introduced me to the book. :)

-Meg

I thought the styles were pretty close, great job on it. That must've been hard to do :/ Do you think Ralph would ever say what had happened on the island? *sighs* well i hope you keep on writing, i'm curious to what will happen next. After finishing the book (darn block class) i was pretty disturbed. And I felt that i needed more closure than the end of the real book. This is why i'm here. *shruggs*
PS: could you plz email me about the symbolism in the book? I got some of it, while others i couldn't. Need help on that, thanks a bunch ^_^

Argh, that was just too cool, Jen! I liked that very much, I did. ; ) And that's saying something, since I didn't like the book to begin with. In anycase, that confrontation between Jack and Ralph was great. I think it accurately portrays what would have passed between them. And your descriptions were quite nice. Now I'd best plod over and review you're other story. I'm sorry I missed the 12:00 am deadline! Oy vey.

Ah, excellent continuation of the story. Hits it right where it left off. You really have mimicked not only Golding's language style, but most importantly the flow of his writing.
Unlike most of the Lord of the Flies fics I have read on here, you had a keen sense of the book and it really shines through in the sense of giving just the right amount of detail. Excellent job.
xx Amanda

WOW!That was really good.I can't believe you haven't gotten any reviews yet.It was written wonderfully,in fact I'm a bit jealous now :S...