...im very concerned...wats is that?

sup with that?, too short, and what's it rated M for?, i'm not trying to be a critic!, just saying if you're going to write about some thing, write enough to make someone want to read it, it wasn't enough to get interested in, and why dont you try to be more creative with your dialect, but other than that..., I love most of the American pie movies, and think they're funnier than sh** !, so write more :),

Okay, that was bloody pathetic. Learn to write a story, and then submit it. Asswipe..

Uh...that was realy gay.

thx, deni :)

This is garbage. Cussing and sex are not a plotline. Make up your mind whether it is a script or a story. Learn what spacing is. Thank you and have a nice day.

TAKE A FUCKING ENGLISH CLASS