Great story!
Loved it very much. Bravo!

this was such a great story. the ending was great. i liked how you tied it all together. you really are an excellent writer! thanks for sharing this with us!

How is it that I never reviewed this story? It's always been one of my favorites.

One of the great things about the Citrus Awards is that they provide a chance to return to old favorites and half-remembered gems and savor them all over again, even if this story does fall outside of the rules of competition this year.

This is one of the first stories that I remember lingering with me for days -- I would find myself thinking about it at odd times, as though it were a tale that someone had told me over a cup of coffee in their kitchen -- as though these were real people whose lives kept on, ebbing and flowing, long after I had touched them and moved on.

I love the mood that you created through the whole thing -- you can sense Ryan's growing frustration and despair, the way he never quite fits in at the Cohens or with his mother.

I'm blown away by your spare, evocative language, the way you allow things to build on each other so that nothing is extraneous or tossed-off -- a sentence in the first chapter echoes in the last. The quick, sure descriptions of Dawn's life -- the diner and the apartment -- contrasted with the pool house and the Cohens -- make a silent argument before Dawn even opens her mouth that first time.

And God, I forgot how devastating that confrontation in Dawn's bedroom was -- when Ryan realizes that *she's* been drinking, that AJ has been there all along. And then the way that he recoils from himself after he hits Seth -- that moment that you touch on so delicately -- is he like his father, his mother, AJ? Is he a monster -- and then let drift away, because Ryan himself can't handle it. It's all so beautifully done.

So, I hope better late than never, because this story breaks my heart every time I read it.

Aw!! i love this story! i know you wrote it ages ago but ive only just read it!! Good job!:D

Yay! Most excellent angst!

Ryan at his true self. And the COhens, and specially Seth where true to themselves. I liked it and I hoep you keep on writing, it brought tears to my eyes. You must do a sequel.

Just saw this recommended on TWoP and went to read it. Great story. Quite a believable scenario - Ryan hitting Seth. The writing and imagery is great.

Hey Walter, it's ausgezeichnet from TWoP...I loved the story! You definitely wrote up to the challenge of a plausible Ryan-hitting-Seth situation. Your story has me all verklempt at this point, but I wanted to say that I totally felt for Ryan the whole time, you really got to the heart of his not-really-belonging, feeling like he is always right on the edge of getting thrown out. And I was so sad the whole time he was in Chino. I am trying to think of something I didn't like about the story, but it had everything (Cryin' Ryan, Ryan/Seth interaction, plenty of Kandy, and minimal Marissa). Great story, I am off to read more! Thanks for writing it!

Wow. Very good. I'll now be checking out your other stories. Thank you for writing.

Wow, what a story! Given that the topic of Ryan's negligent & abusive family life is a pretty easy target for angsty fan fiction writers, I wanted to say how much I enjoyed this. You wrote all the characters incredibly sensitively, not indulging at any point but providing the emotional & physical angst necessary to pull it off. BRILLIANT stuff! You should be very proud of yourself & you should also start writing another one (please!)!

good idea keep rolling with it

Walter. great story. i've only sen the O.C once but i think you've captured the essence of it. did that sound corny?
anyway, i hope to see more of you're work.
and if anyone knows of any O.C chat rooms or forums that would be excellant.
and again great story.
peace out
Benjamin M. Pheonix

Another great story! Ryan spending the night at Dawn's was both heartbreaking and gut wrenching. And yes, you definitely accomplished your mission. Your words just flow off the page!

Totally awesome story! Please add more to it soon, I'm dyin' to know whats gonna happen!

Wow Walter, your writing just continues to blow me away!! I saw the link over at TWOP and printed it off to read over the weekend, and I just wanted to say that this was absolutely TOP NOTCH! I can't wait to read more from you!