This is confusing, it might help if you tried to make things a little clearer on who's speaking to whom and what their doing. Just a thought. Keep writing.

I think you need to work on your spelling a lot. You need more detail.

srry not to be rude but i hate it im so sorry next time get help writing your story

Good, but you had alot of spelling mistakes. I think that you should proof read and use spell check before you post. I'm not trying to be mean I'm just trying to help you.

You have got to be one of the stupidest people in the world. You can't even go one sentence without a grammer or spelling mistake. You spelled funeral two different ways and each one was wrong. This was pretty ** awful.