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| DixieH 2008-06-16 ch 1, | abuseThis is a beautiful piece of writing. It's all about how little he knows, but it turns out he knows a great deal. I liked this alot. - Dix. |
| stocktonwood 2005-09-21 ch 1, | abuseincredibly sad. but completely beautiful. great job. loved the ending. you have a great writing style. all very well done. |
| netherfield 2005-03-27 ch 1, | abuseWonderful piece! |
| hobo-hobisho 2004-03-06 ch 1, | abuseThis is excellent. |
| sugar_water 2004-02-10 ch 1, anon. | abuseI thought it was beautiful. Very touching. |
| Jei Hua Mae 2004-02-06 ch 1, | abuseThis was excellent. The realities of the things we remember and the things we do when we get news like that were captured beautifully, and kept in character to what it is likely Eames felt. I like what you've made up, you did a good job with it. Please keep up writing for CI, I'd love to see what else you come up with! |
| a tattered rose 2004-02-04 ch 1, | abuse7th P from the end: the word 'broke' is a bit vague. I want to know- accident, intentional? What happened? Would the department let her get away with one day of councilling? Did she make a deal with the therapist? (I just know there's mandatory grief councilling for EMTs...) You could use more little details actually. Sammy's sick kid is wonderful, the pillow is kinda expected, the broken plates are fantastic. Some of the other stuff is relevant, but too big. Detail on her ritual is great- I can see her day. This is awesome. Another thing I love is that Bobby doesn't come in until P3 - This anniversary is really about her life before and apart from him. On the other hand, I don't know why she thought of Bobby there. Is she looking at him prior to leaving? Why does he have that importance in her mind at this time? |
| 2CoyoteBlue 2004-02-04 ch 1, | abuseGreat story. Lovely characterization piece. |
| The Confused One 2004-02-04 ch 1, | abuseOH! How sweet. It's beautiful and completely natural. I can see it. And I LOVED the ending. It was perfect. |
| daf9 2004-02-03 ch 1, anon. | abuseBeautiful story and particularly fine ending. |