HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That was fantastic! The epitome of every crappy fanfic I've ever read, rolled into one. If you're going to do a parody, you have to do it right, and you definitely did. Great job!

I don't know what to say. I'm ambivalent.
Yes, yes, it's a parody and completely a joke and all that nonsense, but while the second take did make me chuckle i thought the first was overly exaggerated and too much of an attempt at parody that it lost its overall humor. yes, there do exist many obvious and silly cliches in fics, but your first chapter was one of them--an over the top parody trying to exaggerate poor writing intentionally to avoid any real attempts. perhaps someone should write a parody about how many unsubtle parodies are floating around. then again it might be redundant.

that being said, the second chapter was amusing, to say the least. it played on the jokes more expertly and did made me laugh. your other fics do redeem you in my mind for the first chapter's defaults as well, as you seem to have written many good stories, and this one is a small hiccup in the realm of your writing. i'm all for experimentation, but i think the goal wasn't quite realized in this case.

I am deeply disturbed...

two words:

WTF.

LOL.

that is some of the most hilarious BS i have ever come across

We love butt plugs!

HAHAHAHAA! You evil genius!! That was so frickin funny...! I think I personally prefer the first one though...I don't read too many 'Pureblood Hermione' kinda fics, but it was entertaining nonetheless. You fit in every single ridiculously overused storyline, but I have to say that your grammar was too good. Seriously, in this kind of fic, the author generally finds it hard to differentiate between 'they're' and 'their', etc. Please continue. This is far too good to stop now! Maybe for the third chapter...some heavy Draco/Harry? And a jealous Ron? Or something? God, I can't believe SOME people never picked up on the sarcasm...! WRITE MORE. X

I laughed for twenty minutes straight. Then I read the reviews and laughed for another hour at the person who sent the review about how you "totally stole the whole plot from my story." This isn't the best parody I've ever read, but your writing style is amazing. The fact that you are able to do both this and serious Dramione stories makes me faint in awe.

Hilarious. I think this story should be sent to every new Dramione writer who enters this site.

"He was also tall. At 6’3” he was probably the most unfortunately huge Seeker the game of Quidditch had ever seen." Yeah, I can't believe I've never thought of that before. I want to hit myself on the head.

So, I have to admit that I went back and read all the reviews to this story before I reviewed. They fell into two categories: Category A, in which people actually understand sarcasm and find it funny (hey! They must be literate, too!) and Category B, in which the reviewer basically said "uh...werid? lol? idk whats goin on w/ ur story but it isnt as gud as ur othrs. huh!1!"

I've decided mine will be category A.

I love everything about this story, from the fact that you misspelled the title to the totally cliche, one-paragraph sex scene. I'm not sure if this is what you were going for when you wrote it, but this story is the summary of half of the X-number of stories in the Draco/Hermione ship on this site.

And, yes, I did read chapter 2...

BRILLIANT. In fact, to keep in line with the over-used trend, I'd have to say BLOODY BRILLIANT.

When Snape danced around the vat, I got this vision. It was so funny that I fell off my chair laughing, and had to read the rest of the chapter through tears of mirth. It was almost as funny as "Toothy." That was just beautiful. A vision of loveliness.

You are amazing. Please, keep being that bright light in our DM/HG darkness. (Though I do have to agree that u haf 2 wrk on ur speling in the nxt ficcy)

Loving you lots,

Natalie

Man, that really cracked me the fuck up. Just as funny are the serious reviews in response. Good.Job.

OMG, ROFLMAO, HAHAHAHHAHA,the best story ever, blah blah blah...
Guess that should take care of all the cliche reviews that pops up. But really, this parody is great, and it makes me remember some of the really bad stories that I've sometimes come over.. Why do people write them?! I liked the first chapter best, cause the whole snape-sex-god in the second one just freaks me out..
Lots of good lines here.

Congrats...u turned the characters of harry potter into complete sexpots...
THIS STORY IS AWESOME!

Oh my goodness! That was utterly fantastic and hilarious! I nearly died laughing. Hehe. I didn't even realized that Voldemort randomly came back to life in the second chapter until I read Kyra's review. Heh.

I definately needed a good parody. :)

Thank goodness that there are unique writers like you out there. Otherwise the Dramione world would be full of vampire Hermiones who are pureblooded and magically hot. Heh.

Brilliant!!

That was hilarious... all of the things you never want to read in a D/Hr fanfic all compacted into one little story. I'm also torn as to which is funnier - the mental image I got of Snape dancing naked around the cauldrons or the reviews from people who think that you're actually serious in this fic. They should read your other stories, which I must say, are fabulous!

No, no, that's not how it works!..
No, no, my mistake, that's how it always works. Cliched, short and to the ridiculous point.
Nice parody :D especially where snape is like “You’ll be working in pairs for the rest of the year because that’s the way it goes. Malfoy with Granger, blah blah blah...”
I have to say, this is better than the serious fics who try to get them together like this, seeing as you can spell Slytherin and Gryffindor correctly.

WOW, that was bloody brilliant! The first chapter was TOTALLY inspired, and the second was just plain REALLY BAD. And I read some of the reviews...man, some of them even rival the story. While laughing my ass off, I commend you. :)