|Reviews for A New Life|
| jjgeraghty 7/8/12 . chapter 12
Loved the story!
| unsubscribe 5/25/08 . chapter 12
Wow, this was really good. I enjoyed the last chapter alot. Great way to wrap up all the loose ends.
| Dragonmaster Kurai 11/28/05 . chapter 12
i LOVED IT!
hope to read more of your stuff soon!
| Unseen Watcher 4/18/05 . chapter 12
Very nice. They get together and sort things out. Lots of exclamation points, but a good story. Thanks.
| xsilicax 12/7/04 . chapter 12
I found this story deeply moving.
Dealing with the effects of war so intimately using Hawkeye's character really brought the personal costs to the forefront, while the use of Tommy's book, and Hawkeye's conclusion to it, reflect on the broader costs.
I haven't seen much of the later series of MASH - I've only been watching for about a month, and started in the middle - but I can see how Hawkeye could easily get weighted down and conquered by his experiences. His 'voice' was spot on in this piece, and I loved the interractions with his father.
I almost can't believe that this is your first fic!
The only thing I can suggest to improve on is (me being very picky) your use of grammar during dialogue.
For example, you use:
"Thanks Henry" he said softly as he closed his eye[s] and fell... (noticed a sp. here too)
You should always use a comma before the second quotation mark, when the sentence is continued after the speech has finished.
"Thanks Henry," he said softly.
Like I said, very picky.
Anyway, I loved it and I hope you continue to produce more fiction of this quality.
| Swamp 7/24/04 . chapter 3
I'm quite enjoying this. One little note though - try to tone down the use of exclamation marks. They should only be used in conversation, and then only when someone is _really_ surprised or excited. You can usually convey the tone of a comment through the words alone, rather than using a !
| Divamercury 4/1/04 . chapter 12
Awesome story! I really enjoyed it. Great work.
| he who should remain nameless 3/26/04 . chapter 12
I read the first three chapters of your story when you first posted them and it is good to see that you reformatted them so they are easier to understand. For a first fanfiction this is extremely good, you really bought out the personalities of the characters and gave us an insight into what life may have been like for Hawkeye and Margaret after the war. I commend you on the fact that your Hawkeye Margaret romance was somewhat different to the other numerous romances posted on the site and that you made an effort to convey the affect that the war would have had on Hawkeye. However, several small changes could be made to improve the story. Firstly, you use far too many exclamtion marks. Remember ! denotes shouting or excitement in a statement, and people do not talk like this in a conversation or when making observations. Secondly, try and use a spellchecker before posting chapters: the spelling mistakes are all small and are easily rectifiied, such as tare instead of tear. Finally, I believe that the plotline of your story could have been expanded. Instead of skipping the middle of Hawkeye and Margaret's relationship and focussing on the start and end, showing us what occured in the middle would tie up many lose ends, such as what actually happened with BJ and his plans for a reunion? Did it actually occur? How did the others react to Hawkeye and Margret's realtionship? How are the other characters dealing with a return to civilian life? A good story, but with a little reworking it could become a great story.
| StarryWish 3/25/04 . chapter 12
wayhey! great story, totally love it! i'm just sorry it's the last chapter but thanx 4 a great fic.
| Mrs Pierce 3/24/04 . chapter 11
Wow, this whole fic is just beautiful, I can't believe it's your first. I read it all in one sitting and yes - I cried :)
I love reading H/M fics that are written so perfectly and I really hope you do some more work like this.
| Twilight 3-1 3/23/04 . chapter 12
I LOVE this story...Great characterisations and great plot...
| bluesparkle123 3/23/04 . chapter 12
this was a great fic! sorry i haven't reviewed the other chapters... this'll be kinda like a review for everything.
i thought this was really good, the plot was good, the dialogue was good. overall, great job! keep writing!
| CKS24 3/23/04 . chapter 12
OMG! I love this story. I almosted cryed reading chapters 8&9. This is one of my fav. MASH fanfiction stories. You cant end it! its too good to end. Write More stories soon... :)
| CKS24 3/23/04 . chapter 6
I just finished read 4-6. This story gets better every chapeter. Am glad Hawk and marget finaly go together i think its going to do him some good. Good Work. Am going to finshish the next couple chapters...
| bbwholly1981 2/29/04 . chapter 3
i really love it! please continue it soon!