That was bleak in a good way :) It's quite unsettling to see how haunted he still is even though all he has to remember his old self by are vague flashbacks. Somehow he knows there's something wrong with him! Barbara's fear was very believable, too. And his attempts to put her at ease and apologise for his laughter were quite bittersweet.

Ep, that was very good, left me with the creeps too! He has almost an inkling of what he used to be, yet can't be quite certain about it. And as he tries gauging a reaction from others in his vicinity... And yikes, Batman's commentary in the end and him then agreeing to it, with what must've been bliss in his eyes.

This is just awesome - brilliant! So well-written. Hope to read more of your stuff!

My.God. I have nothing to say. That is so powerful and so unexpected. And the ending. Yeah. I have nothing.
*speechless*

I'm in awe.

This really is quite incredible. You've done some excellent work I must say. Normally I don't bother with the Batman section, but this is good work. Keep on updating.

Generally I come across "Pity-the-Joker" stories and feel disgust. From what I've read in the comics as well as seen in the cartoons (yes, I am one of the DCAU generation), the Joker is a character created primarily to be evil, and has no true purpose beyond that. He is a foil, and that is about it.

This story, though...it was a very sad, dramatic look at a man who was broken, forgotten and--greatest of all--guilty. It was a look at a guy who realized that he couldn't change his past and the future wasn't lookin' too hot, either.

You made a very real man, a very real voice and a very real situation. I appreciate that a lot. You provided peaceful closure for a character that I have loved to really hate for a long time.

That takes a lot of writing skill.

Thanks a lot. This was a very well done story.

This is an incredible piece of work. Well-written, totally believable, and very powerful. It's absolutely brilliant.

when i first read this, i thought it was two-face with the mention of the acid. and then barbara comes and he has that flashblack and i realized. how sad...yet so true to life. great job

Wow, I’m speechless. It is hard to imagine what Mr. J could be feeling but I think you captured his thoughts perfectly.

He has a lot to atone for, but how do you atone for something you can hardly remember?

~Nox

Hey there!

I'll admit I stumbled across this story after reading "The Last Temptation of Alfred", then migrating to your author profile and seeing it listed there. Forgive for not reviewing "The Last Tempation"! It made me laugh, though the last bit with the spoon grossed me off, no joke. :)

So, anyway...onto the review for this! Though I've got to add, it's nice there's only one chapter to review- I'm so lazy, heh.

Alrighty then.

First, really good job! I'm not majorly into Batman right now, but started picking through fanfiction tonight and ran across this- thankfully. Most of what's out there just doesn't appeal. This does however, though it is very dark. I'm kind of looking for dark at the moment, in a way.

It really feels like you got into character. You worked through his thoughts, took time to think what he'd be thinking. I like that you make him neat, and meticulous, because he seemed that way before- in the sense that his plans were thought out down to the most tiny sick little details. It's interesting that he goes through most of the story placing his previous activities on someone else's shoulders, "him", then finally switches to "me" at the end. A perfectly logical sense of denial, that.

His conversation with Barbara was excellent. The way he studies her, and thinks about how he should act, what would freak her out or be rude on his part. For instance, knowing not to attempt to shake hands. Really, these bits made a huge difference.

Here's a confession. I've only seen the first Batman movie directed by Tim Burton and bits of the rest, alone with the animated series from the nineties, so some of the history escapes me. Why does he know what Barbara looks like naked, for instance? The way he speculates if he raped her was shocking to read (maybe I'm easily shocked, but I don't think so?) but it made sense the question would be passing through his head.

It is funny that her confinement to a wheelchair never raised any question marks in his mind, any suspicions, but people block the most obvious questions, or don't think of them, so often it still works completely- also, he didn't have a flash of memory associated with that, he remembered seeing her naked. Incidentally, I've read up just enough online to know that she is paralyzed by him when he...shoots her in the back, I think?

The bit with Robin came as a shock, but I knew there had been a Robin in the comics that came to a nasty end- now I know how.

His breakig into laughter was really great. Any doubts I had as to which character it was were utterly erased, though I admit I was pretty certain from the get go, due to your comment about acid exposure and the lack of a beard. It just screamed Joker, to me at least. Anyway, the laughter was good in that it seemed to kick in after a moment, almost like a reflex. A phsyical memory, something done so often the habit took over- and he probably sounded very much like his previous self as a result. I thought Barbara's reaction was a little extreme at first, but looking back and putting myself in that scene...no, I would've pulled away and been ready to flee as well.

Hmm...what else? I think the only thing that bothers me is Batman. His words to the Joker seemed a litle too harsh for him, but then it could be in character. Unfortunately, I simply don't know enough details about his character. It seems clear he was there to stop him from committing suicide- it's a death he can prevent, after all, and I don't think he's the sort of person who would approve in any case. His character has always struck me as extremely gentle hearted in a way, though, so his comment that Joker needed to wait for someone else to kill him to give them the satisfaction of revenge- it seemed off to me.

In all his years, Batman has striven not to kill, and has never attempted to kill the Joker, the man who killed his parents. He's a dark knight, seeks vengence, etc. But isn't it more justice than purely selfish vengence? He has a mission to protect people, and that includes their innocence. I hardly think he'd see someone stooping to kill the Joker in vengeance as a good thing. Anyway, just my opinion, but that seemed a tad out of character.

Unless, of course, Batman was telling him this with the knowledge that it would stay his suicidal hand (which, incidentally, the way you wrote him didn't hint at any suicidal tendencies whatsoever until the end ot the conversation with Barbara) indefinitely. In which case, he wasn't serious about people seeking vengence and him not anything about it, etc.

Though then again, perhaps Batman just telling him suicide was a cheap escape would've worked instead, and that the Joker needed to bear that guilt, etc. instead of running away from it through death? Anyway...besides this tiny quibble, and it is a tiny quibble- I have a tendency to go on about bad things much more than good things, sorry! This story is the best Batman story I've ever read.

So...keep writing, dude! This story is a diamond in the ruff, so to speak. :) And if you really could answer my question- how exactly did he see her naked? And speaking of which, how did he end up in Arkam without a memory? Yeah, these are probably hard questions, huh? :P

I do hope you see this review. Because this story was built just inevitably, every bit following from the last, and what a use of first person!

Thank you for it.

This was an amazing short story. I loved the way everything unfolded so inevitably and yet so gently, in an odd sort of way.

This is one of those stories that is going to stick with me long after I've finished reading it.

I remember reading this a long time ago. It remains one of the finest stories, fanfic or otherwise, I've ever read.

I came here as a result of Betty's rec on crack_van, and I'm so, so glad i did.

This was just - powerful, and overwhelming, and *real*, and horrifying in just the right way.

It makes me want to cry and scream in equal doses, which isn't something I've ever said about a story before.

Thank you (I think) for writing it.