This was a good story but um, slightly confussing. i mean whats this about Baralai being his dad? :( And wasn't Tidus a son of Sin technically I really never had a problem with Baralai's heritage. Just as a No 1 Baralai fan (waves sexy flag) He was slighty OOC and the end doesn't really justify the means. ALso I only got the whole why Yuna married bit after about chapter 11. This isn't a flame because it was good but hard to read and misleading. Sorry.

While I cannot say that this story was too horrible, I cannot say that it was great either. I am sorry. The characters were way out of character. Some chapters were hard to read and at some point I was left asking myself what exactly just happened in the story. I had to go back and see what I was obviously missing but I couldn't see it. There just a big gap that needed to be filled. There were quite a few errors as well, making it hard to understand the situations.

The idea behind the story was pretty good. It was a shame that Yuna couldn't get herself out of the past and learn to be in the future. As for Baralai, I am surprised that he didn't just give up and leave her. She had treated him so badly. Like I said, they we're very way out of character.

Unlike everyone else it seems, I really do not like this fic. I think it is a horrible portrayal of both Yuna and Baralai, and is an insult to their characters and personalities. They are both HORRIBLY OOC. Horribly. What tipped me off was during the first chapter when Yuna said she "wouldn't care if Baralai died". I'm sorry, but that's totally off for Yuna. Secondly, I don't think she would NOT tell Baralai what's really going on. She's too honest. In fact, I could see her sitting him down the night of the wedding and being like, "Please forgive me, but I must tell you the truth of the situation." Baralai is such a good guy; he may be hurt, but if he knew Yuna was being threatened, he would try his best to put a stop to it and save Rikku. The rest of the fic just goes downhill from there... Paine, a film star? What? That's just... wow. Not to mention the grammar and the way the paragraphs were indented and whatnot... this needs a lot of work.

too cute.

Well, I read some of your fic a while ago, and decided to try and read it again, since we're both in the Yunalai C2 community and all that. While I don't argue that you are a talented writer, I do have some friendly critique for you. First of all, I don't think I can emphasize how much OOC-ness bothers me, and there's definately alot of it here. Baralai calling Yuna a **, under any circumstance? I don't think so. Also, since when does Paine hate Yuna and Baralai so much? I was under the impression, from the game anyway, that they were all good friends, so why the sudden change of heart? Also, there seemed to be alot of plot holes. I dunno, I guess I just don't really follow the school of thought that Yuna would be forced into being with Baralai. Altho I did find the part with Baralai acting like a pirate mildly amusing. ~S

This was a great first fic! I wish mine had been as good ^^ (i ended up removing mine, it was so bad in my eyes ^^')

I think that through the first half of the story Yuna And Baralai were a bit OOC despite the circumstances, and we need to work a bit on the whole grammar. There are definitely great concepts in here!

But hey, I don't claim to be perfect either, and i hate thinking i've made someone feel down, so i hope it's all good! :)

I really love this story and i think theres not enough Baralai/Yuna out there! Write more soon ok?
love,
Corrupt

Whew... it's a great ending.
Thanks for finishing this fic! CAn't wait to read more of your works!

Bye

*claps* That was a awesome ending. And this was the greatest Yuna/Baralai fic I've ever read. Keep writing things like this plz!

this end the end of the story? that's so sad...

but everythig was great! I absolutly loved this story. I thought the ending was cute. good lucj on your other fics.

Is it the end?? Hope not!

oh my goodness! what a crazy chapter! i hope it isnt the last one!you'd better update again soon or you'll have a bunch of grumpy readers knocking at your door!

Wow. That was such a great chapter. This story is absolutely wonderful. The detail is so awesome and your skill is even better. Update as soon as you possibly can! I'll be waiting

Excellent Chapters! well done!

aww paine and Yuna friends again!! all will be good in the world!! :) great chappy. update again soon

this is such a good story you obviously have talent as a writer continue writing and keep up the good work i love this story! ^_^