You've managed to capture the feel and characters of the major players very well. Difficult in such a short fic, you've given everyone good personnality that comes through regardless of the source material. Corwin seemed a bit weak, but that just have been a consequence of his appearing in a story he wasn't narrating. Interesting work. I'm not sure if Bleys is quite as noble as he seems to be, but its plausible.

Nice. very funny, and i hope you write more. Nice.

FB

Ha, zabavno poluchilos' Poshla iskat' na forum :)

Grethen: go ahead kamrad, just let me see the results. You can find me on

Zelazny Forum: p210. , nickname Jame Retief. Samomu interesno

glyanut kak ono na russkom budet :-)

Grethen: go ahead kamrad, just let me see the results. You can find me on Zelazny Forum: p210. , nickname Jame Retief. Samomu interesno glyanut kak ono na russkom budet :-)

I really enjoyed this story! Great Bleys! And I especially liked how you wrote atmosphere in Fiona's castle.

Please, can I translate this fic into Russian language?

yours sincerely, Grethen

Wow! Bleys sounds exactly as he should! exuberant, pretentious, bold and... so fun! Great job here!

Enjoying this one. I can post more coherent crits later, but right now I just read it for pleasure. I like your ideas, such as the spell that caused Merlin's wall to crumble. The ending took me quite by surprise- but that Pattern-Corwin does seem to have his prints on a lot more than Merlin picked up on in the Chronicles- this is quite intriguing (Pattern/Corwin is sort of a representation of the other Pattern,no? And it's taking a part somehow...)

I got a laugh out of some of Bleys' reasonings (especially concerning "santa":D). You write his smart aleck thinking very well.

Quite an interesting point of view. You have not only given more highlights on Bleys, but also on Delwin's motivation. More things became clear to me.

Still love it. Bleys's comments had me chuckling a few times, BTW. You write him so well! Delwin seems an interesting character, too, esp. his being as bad as the rest, and not wanting to be reminded of it. Maybe he deserves a separate story?

I agree, it's just wonderful (and I would have said this earlier, but my computer was dead and a couple of othr things happened). Anyway, I'm LOVING your view on Bleys: he seems *so* relaxed; can't bother to get disturbed even when he's falling. Just great :) Oh, and some of the stuff at Tir Na Nog'th just fit well with the lazy Bleys image: the closed door with a we'll reoppen at... - sign.

Wonderful! I don't know how i missed reading this all through before. A great "fill in" for what's missing in the stories.