So far the storyline is actually plausible. Have you read the original novel? THey were interupted when they were converting it to anime and it never got finished. Try to write longer chapters please. Eight pages or so. But i do like it so far.

it's good. A little fast-paced, but good.

BTW, the oytaku link doesn't work anymore...

I overall liked it, but it was paced way too fast!

An interesting story start, better written than many, and with some funny elements.

yay! a fanfic on the topic of taiki's return to hourai >33

I like the irony at the end of the first chapter ... and the disbelief from kouri in the 2nd XD keep up the good work! =D

I really like the story so far. I have been wanting to find a good Kouri story for a while now. I like how you described everything.

Maybe you could try to have Kouri interact with people more and make those interactions conversations.

And is Gyosama ok? Because if he is, this will be like, the perfect story.

Keep up the writing and update soon.

Jo-chan

o.o
quite an interesting spin on the Taiki arc..?
and really quite possible o.o
will you be updating this story??

Love the plot so far. in the next chapter, I think you should say both what ends up going on in Japan after he goes missing again, and also what happes now that Taiki is back in the Twelve Kingdoms world, does he recover his memory? is he taken back to Tai, does he transform into his Kieren form? what? keep up the good work though! can't wait to see what happens next!

OH! Evil cliffhanger!! I LOVE your story,, and I can't wait to hear more! I have been waiting for a good Taiki continuation. keep up the good work!

Is there a sequel? I really love this story, your a better writer than most on this site so I would like to read more from you. This story really seems to follow the story and yet is your own creation so THANK YOU for writting! Your only grammerical problem is that sometimes you don't keep the same tense of time like you'll say "These nice people then, that were being so kind to him, if they were real--they all could be hurt by his curse." but in the very next sentence you say "He stays awake that night, and leaves when almost everyone is asleep." so you see it's a little confusing and hard to read. Subject being pay attention to your tenses (past,present, and future)!

Thanks for taking my critisism (no matter what it's critisism) and keep writting. Shonji

Whoa! very nice story. Keep it up, I'll be waiting for the next chappie! ^_^

Ellenlome

cool

Interesting story. Will there be a third chapter?
I wasn't expecting him to leave horai so soon though will he end up in Tai? Or will the other kingdoms need to intervien?

Hey, it is really interesting. I really want to know what happens next and am looking forward to the meeting between taiki and taiou.

Please do not worry about the small amount of reviewers though. Twelve kingdoms is not really a very renown and popular show so even less people reads it's fanfiction. I had recently came into contact with it and i already fall in love with the anime though.

I think that your summary is the one that puts off people and it does not describe the story well. Maybe it is best for you to change it? Well, it is just my opinion.

I think the story is very good.