A great story. Very good.

It is good, yeah. One problem, you spelt worshipped wrong and worshipping anyone but god is a sin anyway. Liked your idiolect - very hellsing. I need to watch it again cause i don't remember all the things that it references...

This was, quite literally, the best VH fan fiction I have read. You did a superb job, both with feelings and flow. I was completely floored, as well as moved to tears. Keep up the good work!

Very dark, full of angst and it made me ACHE! An open, brutal interpretation on Van Helsing's feelings about himself. I loved the notion of him living a "half-life".

Oh. Angsty! And also good. I think you portrayed. Van Helsing's character very well.

Whoa, that was angsty. Though, I cannot see the OOCness in it. I mean, deep in his own mind, that is probably what Gabriel does feel.
I beautiful little ficlet, this one's going on my favourite stories list. Keep wirting and I keep reading. Good job.

You just put in words, wonderfully, an idea I was flirting with myself: what will the hunter think, how will he feel, will he still be able to take the lives os monsters knowing himself what it feels like to be a monster.

Too much angst? No way. There's no such thing as too much angst; the darker, the sadder, the more it breaks my heart and leaves me with the desire of rushing to confort my fallen heroes, the better.

It's like that Garbage song:
I'm only happy when it rains
I feel good when things are going wrong
I only listen to the sad, sad songs

;-)

"And in doing so, I damned myself to this half-life. My heart beats still, but it is without purpose, without the drive that made me legendary."

Gods now you got that one dead-on.

"But it's harder, by far, to obey that heavenly directive when the monster . . . . is yourself."

I'm known for analyzing and searching for meanings and babbling to no end about things written that moved me, but when this is concerned, I have no other thing to say save that it's all I wanted to write myself, only didn't find words to put it this straightforwardly without making it sound cheesy and cliche. You didn't - you got that, again, dead-on, and I bow before you for that.

"I feel it, not murderous now, but grieving as only a canine can, with a howl so lonely that I think it could move even God to tears."

If there's a way to capture the remnant of a werewolf inside him - given you believe there was something left of it, as do I - it's precisely that. I love that line. It made me stop to think, and that's what marks a word of value to me.

"Tonight I fall to my knees in prayer, and I do not pray, as most do, for forgiveness and prosperity, for peace and purpose. I pray only that the nightmares stop, that God will find me worthy of heaven, so I can see her again and beg her forgiveness in person. Perhaps that will absolve my guilt."

No comment, really. I can't comment coherently, without repeating myself, just to tell you that, again, you got that right and in a beautiful way. In context with the text you added in your edit, this works great, and right now I mark it my favorite character study VH fic. I hope you'll write some more, because it's very, very decent and a pleasure to read.

Rhea

I don't know why you might think this fic was OOC...seemed good to me. I've read the books...both the original and the movie tie-in. I'm quite convinced that behind his steely fascade, VH is a very passionate man. The movie tie in says it out loud in several places. I didn't like the ending to the movie, and if we stay with the assumption that that is what happened, then I think this fic fits well with what could have happened after. It works for me. :)

Wow... that was very powerful. A beautiful one-shot. I especially love the last two sentences. Great job.

~ verona

Ooh... angsty isn't it? I love these kinds of storys. I love action/adventure and romance and all of the rest of those genares but I've always been kind of an angsty kind of person.
This really setles my therst for angst.
The best kind of music for this story would have to be Evenescience. The best angst singer who is the lead singer is Amy Lee. I'm going to read this again and put on her Cd.
sincerly,
morwinda

Interesting concept, although allow me to point out - it's by no means meant as inflammatory - that suicide is, IMHO, too far as far as Van Helsing goes. It's a bit OOC, first of all seeing his attitude throughout the movie, and second, his reaction to seeing Anna's spitit in heaven at the end.

Still, the concept is interesting and rather risky, and definitely something I wanted to see written, if only out of pure curiosity. Kudos for grammar and spelling - it's so rare these days that people pay enough attention to it.

I imagine that you're fully satisfied with the fic, but if you ever decided to revise it in order to make it a little more IC, I suggest that you had VH talk less about his death wish - he doesn't strike me as *that* angsty ;) Other than that, it's a nice short piece of writing. Keep it up =)

Rhea