Whoosh. Could this be any more cliched? Gads.

you mutt.
Was lookin at a postcard you sent me last summer. it was very sweet. you were talking about Harry Potter and the Scary Problem.

Hmm.

Also.

I still very much like this fic. its the kinda story you read even though you're not sure what's going to happen (i like knowing. as you will remember from April 1st i DONT like surprises).

You Rock!

Yours,

Forever and as always,

Faithx

Hola! This be sanieidominum/gelidusignis from Live Journal (read: Snape and lucius from The Forbidden Ones). Told ye I'd be here!

Alright, now for the review:

Not bad, writing wise. You, thank God, have a rather accurate knowledge of a little thing many people haven't (or don't seem to have) heard about, called grammar. I like the voice you've chosen to write this in. It really adds to the tone of the story as a whole. My only suggestion is to remember that all numbers from 1-99 should be written out - "one, five, seven," - unless they're in dates or addresses.

Idea-wise... well, let's just say that as a genuine Snape-obsessor for four years, I've seen it before. Plenty of times. What makes your original (other than the fact that you know how to use of a spell-checker/dictionary and that you have pretty good grammar) is your voice. What could make it even better would be if you made the story somewhat longer. Or, actually, in this case, the shortness sort of ends to the voice of the story, so it works. However, right now, it doesn't seem to stand well on its own, though this *might* be in part because of the ending. You might want to change the ending a bit, because, no offense, it's kind of boring/cliche. It doesn't hit you with the punch the rest of the story sets the ending up to do (Tip: Shorter sentences impact more). If you plan on adding chapters, you might want to consider ending with some sort of hanging lines setting you up for your next one, which doesn't necessarily mean that you have to end "in the thick of things," or with your typical cliffy. Just end with something that is conclusive, but doesn't seem like the ending of the whole story.

Otherwise, great job! If I didn't think so, I wouldn't have bothered to try and help you improve.

^_~ Looking forward to the next chapter. Good luck!

-Aledia

Very good!! I hope you write more. I have never given any thought to Severus's childhood or his parents. It explains a lot. Thanks and I'll be seeing you around the FO.

~Jen (Lavender and Sirius)

blah blah t rox blah blah.

I find it interesing you seem to be able to have time to type all this up and put it up, and yet it still seems you have NO time to read and review my stories. interestin that isnt it?
luv u

Wow. This is really well written and I love the way you've made Snape such an innocent little thing - dramatic irony, hehe - whilst highlighting the dark undertones subtly... if that makes any sense (wibbles).

Write MORE. Please... I really wnat to read more of this.