While your story is a bit humorous I'm afraid I'm going to have to drop it here. It's just... way too much dialogue without any detail to speak of. Punctuation is wrong pretty much everywhere and you hardly ever dress your dialogue with a frame of reference for who is speaking, their tone, or any other number of a million things that would turn this story from bad to readable.

No offense is intended here really. Its just so... stark. I don't get any imagery from any of the scenes. Just bland dialogue with a thousand he said she saids.

Worse its the purest incarnation of the perfect world. So perfect that its just boring.

Hermione's Catwalk was funny though. Heh.

Ja!
MB

I know it's been a while but pleeeaasee don't give up on this story. You are an incredible author and have no doubt that you will go far. I love this story and will be so sad if this is how you are leaving it! Update soon!

OMG! r u trying to get at the fact that Tom Riddle goes after Neville in the other world not Harry?! If so i love you this is such a good story!

My name is Erin! I'm loving Erin Potter so far... haha 3

Great story towards the end I will subscribe with the hope you continue on with it

Cheers

I love this story! The world isn't TOO perfect, but Harry doesn't have to deal with something like the other him hated his parents. Please continue (and maybe finish? Please?)this some time in the next hundred years!

:) intersting

Wow! I gotta say this story was amazing! First time I haven't skipped ahead because it turned boring. I do hope you plan on updating soon! Even if it has been six years! Please update mate! Please!

UPDATE! Update now! I can't wait for your next chapter, so you better get on with it!

Good story so far, although I spotted some grammar mistakes. I am a college graduate, with a degree in editing, and if you ever want anyone to edit your posts, I would be more than happy to.

you should totally update this. i want to know how harry and the rest get back to their world.

sweet I'm the 1400 reviewer. Great fic by the way.

fuck you. no halfway decent author will hold a story hostage for reviews. you disgust me.

I really liked this story but there are e few things that really bothered me. Like how oblivious Harry seemed of Riddle at first. The moment the man said he wanted power, shouldn't Harry been knowing that Riddle was turning dark?

And the fact that there is no mention about that death eater attack and they just happily celebrate christmas instead of talking about what happend. No explanations or what. That was really annoying. Or the fact that his father doesn't ask questions about the fact Harry seemed to know a lot more then he shouldn't have when there was an attack.

Or even more explanations about the fact that suddenly there are death eaters in that world that haven't been mentioned before. And no more explanation about the mentioning that Malfoy's father was the "Dark Lord", I mean come on!

You could have done much better at this story with more background. Every time Harry found out about something you would think he would investigate and there would be an explanation, but nothing!

Maybe it's a good thing it has been that long since you updated. I would suggest that before you start this story again you should make a few adjustments. Otherwise it just doesn't come off as a story that could be happening.

It just made the story kind of unreal. I like stories where something totally different happens like being transported to another world. But it should make sense, it should be a posibility that could happen.

Ah well...

You might want to seperate the sentence spaces so people who have trouble reading can read it.