HELLO WHO EVER READS THE REVIEWS READ THE CHAPTER 3 AND THEN CHAPTER 4 REVIEW IT IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE THEY ARE IN THE PUB SCENE AND THEN AT SUN ILL

HEY I GOT AN EMAIL ALERT ABOUT THE NEW CHAPTER AND IT IS REALLY GOOD I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPENS NEXT HAPPENS NEXT (IM SAD LOVEY)

oh dear, that means they can't be together!! aww!
miz~g

Poor Sheelagh, she's got alot to think about, I mean not only is she married and a mum having an affair but the bloke she's falling for is her cousin. Poor Sheelagh I'd hate to be in her shoes.

*Claire*

Good God! What a story! He should tell her, it's not like Sheelagh can ask her mother (unless she can talk to the dead!)

Great twist

*Claire*

Oh ma gad! intersting! lol sorry im on a sugar high!

uh oh, des's paretns dont seem to be very happy! much better, much better indeed. update soon plz!
miz~g

Des' Parents! Never would have thought of them.

More soon please

*Claire*

Ooh, who's been spying. More soon please, I'm intregued. (I know I've spelt it wrong)

*Claire*

umm, i know your trying to make it funny, but im not laughing, sorry. des sounds pretty clueless when she asks him out, and he thought it was for friends. a bit more effort is needed on this, i'm sorry to say. try writing it as a proper story, not in script format, because then you can write how the characters have spoken.
this isnt a flame, because i dont believe in it. it says at the bottom of the review box that i should help you, which is what i'm trying to do.
please dont react badly to this. ive received a few and they're extreemly helpful to me.
good luck with writing the rest of your story, please take into account what i have said
miz g