Whoa. That was refreshingly creepy.

I can see why some people might get annoyed with the jumping around tenses, but I really liked how stylized it was. The repeatition of the "smell like mother" phrase really tied everything together.

Also, I got a very strong mental image of little Amiboshi covering Suboshi's eyes. Aw~!! ;_;

TT_TT *claps till hands bleed* Great great great great! ;_; sniff sniff

I never thought of Suboshi as being insane, but now I can see how that might work...

After all, he was just a child when his parents were killed. What kind of life did those two lead after their parents perished? How did they survive? That's the main question that went through my mind as I read this.

I haven't read the manga, so I don't know if Amiboshi did keep Suboshi from seeing the slaughter of their village, but it totally makes sense. Amiboshi was always the strong, calm brother. It makes sense that Suboshi would want to be like him, especially since Amiboshi was so protective of his brother.

Awesome fic, will be adding it to my favorites for sure. ^_^ Ja ne.

H-C

Yess!11 I have finally found the inspiration I needed...for an fy story...that's stuck in my head for months now... ^^; Oh yeh and so far the best fy fic I've read so far. Kudos on you! XD

I love the ending. I swear, I don't think I would have done it better than myself. o.o Though I think there's quite an overusage of ellipses...that's just my opinion. It could be your unique style of writing, afterall.

*directly goes to favs*

Very interesting. I think the stream of conciousness works very well here. I enjoyed reading this.

That was beautiful. The last line was so simple, yet very powerful. Great job.

Aniki...when you died...did you smell like Mother?
That line-- just /hit\ me, right there. I think you've captured Suboshi's madness very well. He's concious of what he's doing, yet justifying it. Creepy in a way and very sad. It has a nice almost poetic rythm as well. In the sea of crap on ff.n, you're story shines. I hope it gets lots of reviews because you certainly deserve them. Best luck! Night Mare

It's nice though a little confusing for a muddle head like me. But still, keep up the good work!

Aww... ;_; This was so beautiful.

Ah.. you're such a beautiful writer. T-T I want your writing skills..
This is such a sad poem. You can imagine Amiboshi covering Suboshi's eyes everytime, along with all the pain they suffered. v.v
Keep up the good work! ^^