After reading your more recent one, I'm going through your older stories/snippets.

I do like how you present things, like little moments in time.

Barbara

I adore this style although it may get a bit tedious and hard to read if every single chapter was done this way. It is a great style to use as a Prologue or Epilogue or even in between the larger more meater chapters. I commend you on trying out something diffrent. I am sure you will recieve negitive criticism on this style from people who would never be so bold as to try it themselves. Good luck on the rest of the story!

Hi fiery frost,

Came to your story via the C2 archive that also has a few of my stories. I love this piece - those small scenes, like spotlights in a dark place, and I like this style - it reminds me of haiku.

Keep writing!

Cheers
LH

It's good. Not great, but good. I think it needs a little more meat, more plot, more story. The "flashes" make for an interesting style, but not for an entertaining story. Work on this.

The style is great, so lyrical and dream like. And it's YohjixAya! Looking forward to next update!

It's an intresting style of writting, but I must admit I don't particularly care for it. It lacks details, and I particularly admire authors who can work details and discriptions to their full perfection. However you story isn't necisaraily bad, there are parts and phrases I like.
But wait I see it now, are these parts of chapters to come, and your starting off the story with a series of previews? Now that is an intresting writing style. I don't think I've seen it ever before. Good for you for trying it out! I'll have to check back on this to see what you do with it.