This was a good read. You captured Yugo's and Alice's personalities quite well. There's nothing wrong with omitting a sex scene every now and then. You had some spelling errors from time to time, but they weren't really out in the open. The plot structure was pretty good but not really that captivating to me. I give it a 8/10.

A great story. I love the way you described the intamite parts in just enough detail so that what's going on is implied, but you don't go into dirty details. It's very tasteful. I feel that way is much better atconveying the true emotion and not just writing some smut story.

I think your story was great, I really like how you kept there personalitys through out the story. Well keep writting I enjoy your work.

This is so bloody adorable. Excellent imagery.

Cute! :heart: This makes me warm and fuzzy. Nicely written! :applaudes:

totally luved it!

jin: ^_^

Ohh my God, im new to reading fanfiction, but i can tell you're damn good doing this stuff! i just love your story, keep the good work!

That was an awesome one-shot. Excellent coupling, and a very nice love scene. All in all, a good read.

This was an escellent story! I particularly liked how you portrayed Yugo- his inner thoughts got quite a few laughs out of me. And the mention of Long cooking made me giggle a lot. All in all, this was a great one-shot fanfic. I'm going to have to read more of your stuff in the future!

Aw... this fic whooped ass! ^.^ nice going with this!

I am so glad that you wrote it, for this story abso-fucking-lutely kicked ass. :D (Though please excuse my language if you don't like excessive swearing. ^^0) Aww, Yugo was so sweet in doing all that for Alice! Well, he DID get something pretty good out of it too, but still, if it's the thought that counts, the actual carrying out of intentions should be worth a tenfold. Hint of lemony goodness is always a plus, and it's interesting to see the more lusty and passionate, loving side of Yugo and Alice's relationship (they're usual pretty mature and serious - yes, I know, even Yugo, shocking as it is =P - when it comes to their normal life, after all). I of course adored that little scene with Yugo discovering Kenji's special visitor, although I sure hope he used protection and all that. Some real-life teenagers today really are stupid as hell... ^^0 I like that you changed Uriko and Alice's hair back to normal (Uriko growing it long again is good enough, just so she doesn't have that horrible cropped look). Too bad Hudson's too stupid to pick up on that hint, but oh well... >.>; The shopping scene was pretty cute, and I laughed out loud when Kenji and Uriko were making fun of Jenny for wearing such a damn skimpy dress in front of lots of important people. :D Speaking of Jenny, I just uploaded an Alenny fic a few minutes prior to reading this, so feel free to check that out if you'd like. ^_^ Well then, I'll see you next update, dear friend. :)