Ooh, cool ending to the dream. With the pain. Enticing. *grin* And "That was new." Good line. Boy, I love Navi. Always have. I'm actually really surprised about the way Link seemed to know what was going on with the guardian fairy business, that Kokiri (don't) exist, and that Navi apparently isn't from around here. But apart from all that: Navi's so incredibly perfect! You even put in all her mannerisms from the game! It's cool. I'm very interested to find out what exactly is in Link's past and why the sword was there. And what sword is it, exactly, if any? OK, 'nother tip: make it real. Don't rush. If there's a part that really relies on the heavy emotional energy, make sure you put it there. It's good as it is, but it couldn't hurt to slow it down for the drama. (Instead of just saying "pause for effect", actually pause. You know?) This isn't show and tell; it's just show, period. If you have to explain something, you didn't show it well enough. Generally. I think you'll figure it out. (And I'm not necessarily picking specifically from this chapter.)

It's so hard to avoid the cliches, I know, because The Legend of Zelda is, like, THE story that created so many of them. (Well, if Hyrule were our real history...) So I'll let the few slightly cheese-colored moments pass, of course (like Zelda explaining her dream). I mean, how else could it be done? You're right. But I think it would be helpful to be aware of them... (?) Pah. Anyway, as always, you're great. You're getting better with dialogue, I've noticed. I like it. And your narration is sharp and intelligent. Good.

AH! I'm so uber-excited for this story! Like, way too excited. Beyond reasonable...reason. Zelda is SO cool here. And I never like Zelda, so that's a definite hand to you. Of course, I'm looking out mostly for Link. Love him, too. LOVE the world, by the way. Excellent, excellent idea to have all the sub-levels and stuff. Brilliant. I am a little concerned that Link just kills three Lizaflos without a second thought, but I can deal, I think. I'm interested in these dreams, too. Oh, I can't wait to read more... :) P.S. Nice shot to Miyamoto. Love you.

Argh, I love you. As always. You know it. However (there's always a catch, isn't there?), I do have to say that "towards" isn't a proper word, but "toward" is. And be careful about staying in the nominative case when using forms of the verb "be" (if you know what that means...). Tip for life: remain fluid. You know, smooth reading. But I don't have to tell you that! Heh.

Sweet, update. Nice story, very nice. It flows very well. The past is catching up to our cynical hero, and he feels it. Navi is probably confusing him to no ends right now, as well. Heh, well, update soon.

-Razvanor

Is this the Master Sword? I thought the gem on it was yellow though. Regardless, this was one funny chapter, in the beginning anyway. It got action packed near the end, which was awsome. Keep writing the good ones!

Hey, I figured this story deserved a review. Even though I normally don't like futuristic Zelda stories, it is intriguing to say the least. I love the way you insert the corporate world with the game and the futuristic theme. In short, I love it. If you would try update it and the End of Destiny story soon!

finally! another update. Hence, I leave you with three words:

write faster, d@mm*t! :P

Excellent, excellent. Please, continue. The story is very imaginative. Your vision of the future worlds is well realized, but I've seen such settings in Star Wars and The Negotiator. However, wonderfully done. I eagerly anticipate your next installment.

She pretty much lost him with the tool bit. Link is not one to disavow his own identity. Wonder what Navi will do? The little glow ball's little more then an information packet. How could she change his mind? Childhood dreams of having a faery? Keep writing the good ones!

I really do hope that the man following him is a good guy, but that seems rather doubtful. As always, you write interesting stuff. The Miyamoto bit was hilarious. I enjoyed that. Keep writing the good ones!

Wow, this is great. I can't be lieve it took me so long to get around to reading it. Your background is impeccable and your storyline moves ahead at a great pace wehre it is understandable yet not too slow. I love the description too. Keep it up!

Wow. This is great. It has imagination, action, witty dialouge. This has awesome potential.

As always, your supieror writing skills have left me in awe. This is not me sucking up or being overdramatic. It is the truth. It seems like a good futuristic Zelda, but I can also see some light Final Fantasy 7 in it. All in all, this should be interesting. Keep writing the good ones!

'Bout time you updated, Niz. This reminds me somewhat of Final Fantasy VII. Pretty good so far; I look forward to future installments.