OMG! THIS IS PURE BRILLIANCE! YOU SOUND JUST LIKE TOMORRA PIERCE HERSELF! i must say there were 3 or 4 grammatical errors however, but i adore the fact that you included that the priest was in love with sarra and the *shudder* daine!

What an amazing story. Written like a true writer. You totally had me on the edge of my seat wanting more !! Thanks for making sure a beautiful tale.

The story is very good so far, well written. I usually read stories the whole way through before commenting, but the whole feedback thing with the sex seen, had me. Really you did it totally clean and pure, well written, and sweet. I think it made the story even better. Keep up the good work.

So, just thought I'd let you know that I really enjoyed reading your fic, you've really captured Tamora Pierce's style and for the most part, your writing is excellent.

There are still a few problems here and there, but considering how old this fic is, you've probably grown as an author and picked up on most of them yourself by now. I think you could have improved chapter 14 by having a couple of villagers stand with Rikar, the general change of opinion made sense, but having the entire village suddenly 'not-quite-accepting-but-I'll-deal-with-it' was a little much.

Also, this could probably do with a good edit, in some places it's easy to see where you've decided to change what you were writing because there's a single word which makes no sense in the middle of the sentence.

Finally, I feel like I should stand up for your anonymous reviewer of chapter five. I think that upping the rating PG-13 was completely appropriate. You're certainly correct that the way you wrote it was very tasteful, hardly nasty at all in the grand scheme of things, but it was still more...explicit than what you find in cannon. If you brought it up to T, I can only assume that it used to be K+, which is supposed to be ok for 9 year olds. I have lots of friends who first read these books as ten and eleven year olds, so it IS (sorry, no italics) likely that there would be younger readers of TP fanfic. I definitely wouldn't have wanted my nine year old cousin to have read that, so I can only support this fanfic's change of rating.

Sorry for how long this is, but I don't seem to be able to just say things, I need to explain my reasoning. I hope your novel went well and wish you good luck in your future writing escapades,

Sleuthy.

Most. Amazing. Story. EVER!

OK...simple truth, worship exists, and im feeling it, cause this story is GODLY! As in like on par with Tamora Pierce's books! You totally rock ^.^

I think this story gave me a mental **.

Seriously. I can't. Can't. Can't. Believe how well it is written. It is written exactly-no-better than Tamora herself would have, dishing out a brilliant, bloody brilliant, ridiculously brilliant orgasmic powerful superdosage of action, adventure, cause, and passion between probably the best couple in the entire literary world. I'm, if I could shriek if it weren't late at night.

I can't tell you how satisfying that was. I can't. I can't. God. Marry me. It wasn't just that it was well written or a 'fanfic', it was like a perfect, REAL side-traveling of Daine and Numair, rich with characters, and EVERYTHING. Oh god. Oh god. I need a bag to breath into. EVERYTHING. I mean, do you even...

Do you even understand what you've done? I think I've lost a few years of life because of this story. There wasn't a single waste of a paragraph, a single part where it slowed down, there was so much passion and love but it NEVER got overdone or sappy or lewd, it was...I mean, good heavens. I think this is dangerous. This...this, I think this melts knees. Literally. I think, I think I've lost my knee bones. Oh god. It could take out an entire city of people if it was played out. We'd all just fall over, because our knees would have been reduced to puddles of bone.

Marry me. For this story alone, you are now one of my favorite authors. No. My Favorite. I don't care if your other works are the spews of inebriated douchebags, Marry me.

I really enjoyed this ff. There were very few spelling or grammar mistakes and it had a well defined plot. I just resently got a profile, so you are now the first story that I have favorited! Please exuse any spelling mistakes on my part for I am a terrible speller.

Lovely story <3 I'm glad that stupid idiot *cough*Vanel*cough* got what he deserved. ^-^ I noticed you often put 'form' instead of 'from', though ^,^ Anyways... *goes to read more*

This was excellent writing! I can't wait to read other stories of yours x

;ove this story I must have read ita dozen times.

aww that was such a sweet story! its the best DN one i've read! :)

God hast given thou a gift. Use thy gift and do not tarnish it for you will be rewarded.
-Silver-Creasent-MOON1995, Ch1 1-1
Yeah i Was readin the bible before this but you do have a gift and I like the story

This was a great story! You have alot of great suspence to you story especaily with all the action. My only thing to say that there is alot of fluffy with Daine and Numair. It nice now and then, but after a while it gets to the point that that's all there is, and there is definity more to them both(not saying it's not nice now and then). Also, I would try to have more of an ending of "... and so they lived happily every after, the end" and all that mushy crap. But other than that it was a great story and you should continue to write. Now that your on your feet with writing from other people's stories, I encourge you to start writing your own stories, if that's what you want to do. I know you can do it if you really wanted to. Have fun and happy writing!

ok so that fan fic was amazing! i loved it it had some of the bbest writing I've ever read. anyway if you haven't already read this black cat and vampire knight are 2 extremely good manga. so read or not great story thanks fro writing.