Could you PLEASE go back and edit the first two chapters into a better format? I mean no disrepect to you, but it takes longer to read the current format, and it can get quite confusing. Again: I mean no disrespect, nor do I attend this to be a flame. Just a simple request that you edit the format to make it easier for your readers. Thank you.

awesome story i loved it you should so write a sequal about them remeeting and gatting together that would be awesome

love

rebecca

Lexy, Brittany, Rebecca...I'm confused. Where did these girls come from?

and the last paragraph: there were some sentences that didn't make sense gramattically. And personally, in just my opinion, I don't like it when the author says they "made out", becasue the reader already knows what they're doing. And just saying the owrds "make out" ruins the whole picture.

You're not allowed to put author's notes by themselves on a chapter. Just thought you should know that.

Again, please space out your paragraphs, and it's really confusing in who says what.

HA! I'VE FINALLY GOTTEN AN ACCOUNT!

Why should your lesbian character hook up with Zigzag, Squi, or Magnet? Why always the so called "cute" ones? Haven't you ever thought up of the saying: don't judge a book by its cover!

And why haven't you spaced out your paragraphs like your reviews have asked? That's what reviews are for, you know. They tell you what you need to improve or emphasize in your story.

is there more?

This story got the song "Poor Unfortunate Souls" stuck in my head for hours. NEED I SAY MORE?

ps: please learn how to use punctuation marks.

that was the best fan fic i have ever read! it was really really good. i wish it could have lasted longer tho, when they had to leave i was like NO its over already. keep writing that was great.

it's really really good. i was sad to find that they had to leave. i was all like NO! but it was very good. i enjoyed it all. and i hope you had a good time in london, when i went i had a great time. well the story was great, i'm just upset its over. maybe a sequel?

Countess Jackman

i luv it give me 5 minutes to read ur other story

Still good, keep going.

ok i ca dont like this chapter. i kinda like it but... ok i dont like it, but i sent u back the email and hopefully i helped you um if not e-mail me back and i might have more ideas kk TTYL

Hey, awesome stuff! Keep it up...:)

Woohoo for another newsie lover! Ok the stories well writen, one problem, drama...makeout...someone from their past comes...drama...makeout..someone from thier past comes It would be ok with maybe only one girl, and plot going much potential though!