Why can't you make it into an ElazulxAnli? TT^TT

Hey, you updated. Cool!

I like the backstory you're crafting, and the now-story you got going on. And HEY LOOK! Character Personality, Yay! :D

(Psst! Matilda is an Abbess, not an Abyss. I didn't know how to spell it, either. ^_~)

“Laz! You’re an old fart!” AHAHAHAHAHA...*dies laughing* Sorry, no review. You KILLED me.

Okay, okay, I don't know why that cracked me up so bad. Anyway. Elazul does seem to aqcuire quite the range of nicknames around the fandom, doesn't he? Someone should tell him if he didn't get so _irritated_ by it, people would stop. ;)

Loved all the running around and singing and crashing into people in chapter five. Bud's got a crush on Pearl, aww. 'The calvary has arrived!' *giggles* And _of course_ all the boys like Anli...she's wearing VISIBLE UNDERWEAR. Ahem.

Right, on a more serious note...the writing for the latest chapter is MUCH better. I knew it would happen. The dialogue and descriptions blend better and the grammar mistakes and such are pretty much gone...

The only thing left that still bothered me (minorly, minorly) is that the chapter's mainly from Anli's point of view, but a couple of times Elazul's thoughts steal in without a break in perspective. Just a little unnatural, though I know you want to point out what he's thinking.

And no worries about the shoujo influence. Heck, I adore Escaflowne. ('cept for that ending, what was up with that? IloveyouIloveyousavetheworldokaybyenow. Seriously, people...) Anyway, I didn't notice a _specific_ Escaflowne hue until you said so, and now I'm like 'ooh, angel!'. But hey, we all do that...I've got more than a few anime influences lurking around my stories.

Gah, I'm rambling again. Anyway...much as I like your new style better than the old...I wouldn't recommend re-writing the other chapters. Not until you've completely finished. Otherwise, you'll get lost in the rewriting, and frustrated, and end up on another hiatus. I've been there...so! Don't do it! Keep pushing ahead!

Oh, and of course your pairing is obvious. Come now, you're like the Escad-fangirl-queen around here...I've seen your forums and your reviews and your profile and your deviantart page...there's NO POSSIBLE WAY you're going to convince us, even briefly, that it's going to be heroine/Elazul after all. ;)

It's still extremely funny to see though. Everyone likes love triangles, even when the outcome is known.

Keep writing! It only gets better and better with practice! :)

Well, I was going to wait until I read it all to review, but I'm getting tired, so I figured an early one couldn't hurt, and I'll read the rest tomorrow. ;)

I'm liking your style here, for the most part. Long chapters are good, and giving everyone surnames is a nice touch...do they mean anything or are they simply to give characters more depth? Either is fine.

The only thing that seemed a little...clashing, is the difference between the dialogue and the descriptions. The descriptions are heavy and detailed, while the dialogue seems very light and, hmm, modernized? I don't know if that's quite the word. Both are good, but they don't quite seem to fit together sometimes.

A lot of the 'vision' type stuff from the first chapter seemed repeated in the second...almost unneccessary. It was hectic and insane enough in the first chapter to be memorable. I suppose it's an emphasis sort of thing, but it actually lessened the emotional force of the first chapter, I felt. Plus, it causes me to skip over it, and then I start skimming and I always feel guilty for skimming...

Er, sorry, rambling. Anyway. The heroine's got a foul mouth and one heck of a temper, and she cracks me up. I really like her. Like a permanent caffeine rush. I love how she keeps falling too.

I'm assuming the kid from the vision with the 'be strong' voice is Escad... (I really liked that, by the way, it reminded me of the beginning of the Sword of Mana remake on the Gameboy Advance. In a good, cute way. Aww.) and the one Meimei is talking about, but I'm going to laugh hysterically if she think it's Elazul for a while after the 'blue eyes' thing. :p

Speaking of Elazul, he seemed a bit speechless. I always thought of him as a bit more...decisive. But maybe that's just in response to Anli's, um, forceful personality. ;) You tell him, girl. I'm almost sad they didn't get into a tavern brawl after all, but...like you said, I can't really see it.

Niccolo was pretty well done...a little annoying, but in-character annoying, and it makes me laugh that he gets along well with Anli. Birds of a feather... *ducks*

Anyway, I hope I don't sound too critical. I just noticed you started this three years ago, and things can change a lot in that time, so...

Overall, I really do like it, and I'm looking forward to more. :)

Tee Hee. I fell in love with this story, finished all chapters in about two hours and almost missed the bus to go to work. My mother had to yell at me twice to snap me out of the written world. I'm sad that it is on hiatus, and sense it's been two years, you're probably not going to finish it I guess. Sad. Anyway, it was great, the ghost boy makes you sit and ponder what is it come. Pray you do finish it, there arn't very many Legend of Mana stroies that have updated.

Cool. I like your fic please continue and update soon

I really love your fic!

I wonder who the ghost boy really is?
And who is this person that Anli's been looking for? Is he the hero of Legend of mana?

Oh! So many questions! Pls update soon!

Hehehehe. I like Escad. (I also like Elazul. Too bad I don't know which I like better) This is really original. Everybody sits around and bashes Escad because he believes in something. It's really nice to see someone who likes him too. Update soon!

Nice.

Many a hurrah for over-descriptive game novelizations. Muchly lovable they are, and in this case I don't even know where to begin. Enjoy the characterization; enjoy the world... The mystery, the fun, the pumpkins! The pumpkins!

Only one little error I see - where Elazul's core was given the lantern. Unless of course, it is somehow intentional.

Anyhow, uhm... Yeah. Carry on. ^_^

I LOVED IT!! i knew that this story would be a good one!! , but you GOTTA finish it!! i MUST know the ending! sorry i didn't review for the other chaps but i was too caught up in the fic to bother to set aside time to type a review and miss valuable reading time , tee-hee , hope to see you update soon and i'll be sure to read any other stories you might have around here , tee-hee , thanks for the great reading experience!!

wow! i loved it!! the intro was amazing!! please continue writing great fics!! but not until you finish this one of course , tee-hee

Spectacular chapter. But...

...knights and guardians aren't lovers, you know. Sibling, comrade, friend, ally, etc. But not LOVER. Lover doesn't, and NEVER has, fallen under the category of Jumi's relationship with their partners, as it is. Therefore, it's sort of wrong to say that Elazul and Pearl are a couple in more ways than one. It's just...wrong.

Of course, there IS the exception of Rubens and Diana, but it's too complex to interpret.

Anyway, that's it. I've ranted too much now. So I bid you farewell. And good luck in the rest of the chappies.

~Xichiathik

Hwahahahahahaha!!

...okay, now why did I just laugh like that? *blink* Never mind. I finally got online...FFnet was screwing with meh...

Pearl appeared. *blank reaction* Well, you know how I feel about Pearl. But she's kinda cute in this chapter. ^^

And is that lost boy ? or ?...? Am I allowed to know? O.O

And for some reason I found this line cute and funny: “’Laz! Yer core! It flashed, glowed, made a funny noise! Er, it did something!” XD I don't now why, I just found it cute and funny. ^^

Anyway, update soon. Yes, I will pester you if you don't.

Hwahahahahahaha!

Wow! I like this fic!! UPDATE SOON!!

~Shaan

Okay. I got 2 things I'd like to say. And I'll start with this...

...Now, I remember you mentioning in the previous chapter that this wouldn't be a HeroinexElazul pairing(to my greatest disappointment). But that's not what REALLY fazes me. It's the pairing YOU have in mind. And of all of the most impossible pairings, it's gotta be the noble heroine plus the Liotte knight we'd come to know as Escad, and also known as the "obnoxious one" to everybody else. Hardly anybody has much to say about him, except that he was a jerk and an **(DON'T HATE ME FOR THAT, JUST REPEATING EVERYBODY ELSE'S IDEAS!). If you've really played the game, you'd noticed how over-righteous Escad really is, especially with the way he criticizes you, the main character, as evil-minded when you tell him you can see Faeries(which was true anyway). So, I have a feeling that the Escad we'd be reading about here won't be the same Escad we see, hear, and have to put up with in the game. Likewise, he has about this SMALL a heart for Matilda's welfare, while on the other hand, only Daena truly cared for her. The man is only obsessed on exterminating Irwin and etc etc etc. You can't say he really has feelings at all. I mean, feelings like compassion, empathy, generosity, and even love, not the love as in romance, but as Sir Pokiehl preached, the love that we can share with one another in order to bring bliss. In fact, once when I sided with him and I took him with me to Lucemia and we got back, he didn't have much to say about Matilda when she died. It was as if he never knew her.

e_e ...

So, to make my rambling as short as possible, I'll just say this:HeroinexEscad ain't happenin' with me, dude! As much as ya want it ta, ain't gonna eva happen! 'Kay?

(By the way, I was in "punk mode" when I was talking up there. Don't ask, it happens...)

Thanks for reading, if you ever did.

~Xichiathik