Reviews for Dawn of the Phoenix

Reviews For: Dawn of the Phoenix - Reviews: Page 1 of 3

lauthom 2007-11-12 ch 11,	abuseLoved the story! great mix between original charaters and the Buffy team!
ShadowWren 2007-05-14 ch 11,	abuseAmazing story! ^_^
Kristin Hulett 2007-01-24 ch 11,	abuse:( Poor Lupin! I know at least one of my friends who would not like this chapter, since he is her favorite character. BTW, if the story made me have an emotional response, that definitely means it was good.
Kristin Hulett 2007-01-24 ch 10,	abuseOK, just to get this straight: In one chapter you've made Lucius Malfoy a rapist, introduced him as well as Snape(I'm assuming that's him with the greasy black hair), Voldemort, Dementors, the rest of the Death Eaters(OK, mentioned before now in passing), and mentioned Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Apocalypse Now. Interesting. I got the quote from Apocalypse Now that Kirk made, but what was the other one from? I recognized it but can't remember why, and it is bugging me. Still, great story!
Kristin Hulett 2007-01-24 ch 9,	abuseI know this is probably way late and everything, but just figured I'd comment. Great story, so far. Sorry to be annoying editor person, but some of the spelling bothers me. At least I know what you are talking about, though, even if it is misspelled. :) I actually figured out that Miriam was Raven previously (at least, once hse showed up). Figured if I was right, it was going to be verified later on, which it was. Planning on finishing reading this story and then reading the sequel, when I have time.
Child of Lore 2006-11-25 ch 11, anon.	abuseThat was amazingly written! I can't wait to read more from you.
Angel-love-buffy 2006-10-07 ch 11,	abuselove this fic!
ColPinky 2006-04-06 ch 11,	abuseOkay, so once again I am writing tonight. I am not normally a fan of OC, unless they are well written and you have done that. The set up for the next story is great, and I am looking forward to reading it. Keep up the good work.
Sterling-Ag 2006-01-13 ch 1,	abuseOK...Not bad at all. I like your writing style so far and you do a pretty good job with the internal monologue of the characters. My one pet peeve for this chapter is that you should not have to put headers on your story that says "Buffy's POV" and/or "Dawn's POV". Let your writing within the narrative tell us who we are with. Doing otherwise is pretty lazy. Use tricks like having them look at themselves in a mirror and describe what they are seeing, having the character talk to themself, like "The relief of not being the only Slayer anymore gives me more time to look back on things...". You can also have them remember what someone else said to them. Also (small quibble) you used the word tract when you should have used tracked. Be careful with the spellchecker, it can really add in weird, innappropriate words at times :-)
Raiining 2005-04-25 ch 11,	abuseAUGHH! REMUS! NO but wait .. there was a white light .. and Voldie was upset .. could there still be - gulp - hope? And how how how will you merge Buffy and HP? Very very interested ... loving Dawn, btw. okay, off to find the "light brigade"
Raiining 2005-04-25 ch 9,	abusehuh. thought i should review again to tell you this is wicked cool. the bit with Andrew Kirk showing up with magic kinda threw me for a bit, but I stuck around and read the exlaination ... still think you used the word "yelled" too often .. I thought he'd completely lost it. it just seemed kind of out of character. but now I have the urge to go read the "before" story on this Trinity people, and the even stronger urge to read the next in the series. so I'm gonna go with that one. ;-) want to find out when Harry and gang come into this .. oh .. and I was surprised to hear Spike is still there. he was really in the background during all the planning sessions, and I thought for his Bit he'd do more ... but with so many characters I guess it's hard to balance them all out. he got some good lines there though ("Hey! I'm not a girl!") snicker.
Raiining 2005-04-25 ch 3,	abuseAHAHAHAHA Oh ** ... they're Slayers .. snicker. Loving James. reading on!!
Raiining 2005-04-25 ch 2,	abuseHuh. This is a really good fic. love the characters, love the writing ... detialed but not so much so, and very past paced. If you're looking into writng professionally, I say MORE detail would be a good thing. Mind you, that's the thing about fan fic, you don't feel the pressure to explain the characters because you know they're known. And so that kind of extends to the rest of the story. and that works here. but when you write your own stuff, more detail would be good. reading on!
Hone Melgren 2005-04-11 ch 1,	abuseNice addictive prose . Good characterisation . Most excellent sence of adventure . I've fallen in love with your Horseman concept
LadyVisionary 2005-03-14 ch 11,	abuseHi there! I loved this story, and I can't wait for the sequel grins. But please, don't let Remus be dead! pouts and cries visciously This chapter didn't really say straight out he died, right? Right? Getting desperate Well, byes for now! /Ida

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