Add Viola, she kicks ass. Oh and the monkey, you gotta add the monkey.

*ahem* In case you didn't notice, Lt. Bush and Shade are girls. It's Private Sand and Lt. Bush that... well, you should know.

Nice story and idea but yo may have rused italiitle bit as well as the fact that you have too much dialoge compared to the thoughts and fellings of the characters. Overall it is good so keep writing.

Hm, interesting story. It seems well written, and i'm very hard to please when it comes to stories, espicially fan fictions. You might have rushed it a tiny bit, but it seems good so far. I'll be checking this out again. I look forward to furture addtions