There are many spelling mistakes and even more grammar mistakes in your story. Your story also doesn't flow like it's supposed to and there are many awkward sentences. I also don't like Mary-Sues, but I'm trying to keep my review unbiased. So my suggestion is to get a beta-reader, or someone who reads your stories to check for mistakes before you post them. It will help a lot, and I really think you should consider it.

i like it. plz write more.

i hate mary sues.

WRITING THOSE STUPID MARY SUES

This was very good, Akira. I really liked it!