Another great short... Wonder if Donna breaks and Josh catches her... Are you going to write a sequel...

JENNIFER

That is a great line. I don't like "cacophony of noise" as if this fanfic is your excuse to use SAT prep words, but the Toby's ending line is funny so I will take it. Great job, I liked how Josh coming alive makes Donna come alive and vice versa.

i love it! you have the characters down perfectly!

Matthew issues good challenges - and you write well in response. Was the Blizzard of 05 inspiring, or was it the Pats' win that got your muse ramped up to tackle this early season entry?

"De-bac-le." PRICELESS, Classic CJ :)

There are some things going on here in this piece. Unfortunately, clarity, narrative and pacing are not among them.

"Nonchalance didn't work for Kate.." maybe the best Kate Harper line I have seen. Nicely done.

And you aren't off the hook, young lady- I expect nothing less than greatness from you. Or failing that, chocolate.

Always, ReverendKilljoy