AHH! MY NAME IS RAINE!! MY NAME IS RAINE!! OMG!! I'M IN A FIC!! OMG!! ...no,seriously,my name is Raine...really! honto!!

YAY!! You listened to me!! WHO!! ^^ ... I cause youe wonder I'm
aA)Hyper! ^^ and
B) SCHOOLS OUT!! WOT!! Joyfull joyful we adore ye ladedade da dada .. hmm hm hmm hmmhmhmhmm ... Ninja In the Night!! In the conf8stion of a smoke bomb I could steal your bra and you wouldn't even know it And I can jump from roof to roof and get my friends free cable Its Baad As! And I cna use my chinese star to pick the locks and steal your CAR!! Ninja of the NIGHTT!! ... What its not my fault that song's stuck in my head! Naruto & Sasuke (those are nicknames for my friends) kept on singing it and now its stuck in my head!! ... well /looks at how long this looks/ Wow that's alot 'o' stuff ... YAY!! BYEO! ~Hinata~

Hello, hello again!

Wow, 'nother chappie! Nice job! ^_~ A possible chance to see Riku again? An OLD Riku? Turn young, turn young, please...Oh, sorry. I ate a stale brownie, so I'm probably acting funny. Darn you, stale brownie! Ahem...Wow, so many keyblades...Where in the world did Sora get so many? They're supposed to be just keychains, but maybe you have a good reason for tweaking this aspect. Oh, and I'm sorry, but I'm such a grammer freak...(well, only once in a while)...Sometimes, in the dialogue, you don't put the appropriate period or comma. For example, when Raine says "Come on", there should be a period at the end, thus becoming, "Come on." This happens in various places, but it's okay. It's just that I noticed that...Oh, and in some places, you need some commas, but I think somebody else already pointed that out...Ah, I'm sorry. It's just, when I see an area for improvement, I try my best to help that person clear out any minor, fixable flaws. (That's not including my own work, however...go figure.) Don't worry, though! You're doing an excellent job. Anyways, again, I love the descripton! You have that knack for giving such detail...Would you lend me that skill? ^_^ Like I said, great chappie! And a pretty good place to put a cliffhanger. Keep up the good work!

Hope to see you soon! ^_^

~Risako

*blinks* Why am I on the thankage list...? *laughs* Ah well, amazing chapter and much loveage of the story so far. Keep it going, ne? Umumumumumum...Now for the constructive criticism...Not much to say on that part, love how you described the settings in the second chapter, perhaps you could go back into that sort of detail in the next one? Also, bits and pieces of the story where you lay out the characters thoughts were a tad jumpy. Like with Rowyn, going in about three sentences from solem to evil/happy seemed a bit quick. Dont quote me on it, though! I love how you put everything together. I probably would have made everything long-winded and not made it past the first page; much like I'm doing now...Ah well, good luck with the next chapter, were all waitin' on it! ^__^

Now now, you're still a frosh. Let's not get to full of ourselves, hm? lol
Your welcome! I love your story. It's rich and full of creativity. Your an excellent writer and have a vivid and colorful imagination. Keep it up, because you can only get better.
Question. Isn't there only one keyblade? And the differences are brought out by keychains. How does Sora have four of them? Is this just how it's going to be? Or did Sora do something?
You need to use more commas, it's starting to get confusing.
Ex: It worked almost too perfectly the spell forced the pipes down creating a -somewhat abstract- staircase. I climbed quickly and nimbly jumped into the small space.
It worked almost too perfectly, the spell forced the pipes down creating a -somewhat abstract- staircase. I climbed quickly, and nimbly jumped into the small space.

Another excellent chapter. I’m eagerly looking forward to the next.

DreamSummoner

Interesting. It never occured to me that Raine still had contact with Riku. I'd always believed he was in some abstract world or something and that Raine was trying to free him from it. But this was good. Keep up the good work and update as soon as you can. I know its hard but try your hardest to do so for all us impatient fans out there.

Wow this is really good. It has a lot of description. I like description!

Great story! and HURRY & UPDATE!! ... but it would be helpful if you would say whose POV your useing! still it rocks! ^^ meow!

Hm... nice chapter. I was keen to notice a hint of weakness in Raine's composure! You go Robyne! ^^

Is there a reason you're keeping Robyne's narrator in the first person? You dropped it with Raine... I'm not criticizing, it's just something that I'm wondering about.

Sorry I don't have any ideas right now. I'll email you some if I think of some. Don't rush with updating, the chapters turn out rushed too. lol

Nice room design! The fountain trick was clever!

DreamSummoner

Pwah. Hello again! Yay! Riku quote! I hope he appears...somehow. Ah, you put the line dividers. Now the character and scene switches look better! Umm...thanks for listening! I really appreciate it. Oh, and I like your descriptions. The mansion place sounds cool to explore. Cool walls! Also, your style is new and refreshing. I like reviewing aspring writers! They always write really well.

Now for my question! Did Riku teach Raine to use dark magic, or did he figure it out himself? I've been wondering ever since I read that green magic part. That was some pretty good advice Riku gave. But then again, how in the pickles is Sora going to fight in his condition? An old Sora fighting...How odd...Oh, and Raine, you sneaky dog! How dare you scheme like that, using one of Sora's decendants!(ha...joking.) And Sora! Get off your lazy butt and go save your granddaughter! It doesn't matter if you're brittle! Go and rescue her! Or at least get your grandsons to do it.

Hee...there's some wacky ideas for ya! I'll try to think up some that are actually serious. Welp, keep up the good work! Can't wait to see what happens next! But don't worry, you don't have to rush. If you take a long time, it'll turn out better, right? Plus, I understand how busy school can make people.

Welpers, hope to see you soon!^_^
~Risako

O! Cool! Your writing is so detailed! It's really great! If you feel bad about slow updates you can always take pride in the fact that your updates are faster then mine! I have cruddy teachers too... lol! Well, as long as everyone updates someday I suppose! Anyway, I really love your story, update whe you can!

Good job. I'll email you with ideas later.
-Kira

No anonymous reviews?? sheesh... you made me sign in and everything... lol

Wow... this story is hot! You're an excellent writer, I love your style!! This story is really good, I'm looking foward to the next chapter!! Update ASAP!!

Until Next Chapter!
DreamSummoner

p.s. Raine = hottness ^_^

Hey there! This is pretty good! You've caught me in your web. It's very interesting. Now I'm itching to know what happens next! Haha...Sora's acting old and grumpy...Kind of OOC, but many years have past, so his reaction makes sense. (I wonder what an ancient-looking Riku looks like? Wait a minute...you killed him off! I guess we'll never know...)Also, maybe when you switch point-of-views between Robyne and Raine, you could use line dividers or something. It'll make it look snappy!(Just a suggestion. You can ignore it.) But anyways, me likeys! Keep up the good work! You've caught my attention.

Hope to see you soon! ^_^
~Risako

Hey, This is really good so far!! I like it!! PLEASE update soon!