Squees, you added more Kanau! **Jumps for joy** :-D Thank you!

Can't wait to see the next chapter~~!
~Azzie~
PS: Pweas make the chapters longer! :-(

please wright soon

please wright soon

keep on going i like it

Yeah, Kiyoshi is a male Mary-Sue. But I'm still interested in reading more of this; please update! His blindness is cool. I like blind characters - they are interesting to work with.

On second thought, the blindness explains a lot of Kiyoshi's Mary-Sue-ish qualities. Graceful, slow movements: he's blind and has to move slowly, with great precision, or else he is liable to trip. The breeze: well, something's gotta guide him, and this is the world of EQ, ergo anything supernatural is a go! The unusual eyes: ...did he put in dirty colored contacts and go blind? (Just kidding; the way you describe his eyes is pretty, but very Sue-like.) His irritated, headstrong attitude: he's blind and not happy about it, and is possibly trying to compensate for lack of sight. The fact that he stands up to Mikuni (a rather unusual occurence): he can't see Mikuni and therefore can't be intimidated by Mikuni's imposing figure...?

Sorry for rambling so much. But, please, write more!!

~Tsukiyo

Oh.. I like this! I wonde rwhere you are going with it.. Whatever it is, I'm eager to find out~!

Update soon!
~~Azzie~~
PS: I hope you add a little more Kanau, he's so awesome :-)

Kiyoshi's not much of a marysue yet. Most mary sues aren't blind... actually, he'd be a gary-stu, seeing as he's a he. Not enough information yet to tell though. n.n! I hope to see more of this.

Well... yes, you did. Make him like a Mary Sue, I mean. It may be because this is quite a short chapter, but that was my impression. Oddly colored eyes labelled as sapphire and emerald, the wind, the way he stands up to Mikuni when none of the canon characters don't, his hair's description, Mikuni's interest (though that WOULD be in characters, lecherous priest tat he is.)... Like I said, this may be because this is the first chapter. If I read more of it, I'll probably change my mind.

One thing, though. o_O What happened to Kanau? It somewhat rubbed off on me that you ignored him in favor of introducing your characters. (It's bias. I love Kanau.)

Your punctuations before the closing "s are a bit wonky, though. It may be the format, or something, but generally, dialogues go like this:

"Hi," he said.

Instead of "Hi." He said.

Taking the quotation marks away, it would be "Hi, he said" and "Hi. He said." respectively. But... you didn't need the lesson. Erm. Yeah.

It's a nice enough intro. Work more~

Bows and Arrows