Your writing voice is very fitting with a story like this. It is written pretty well and is very thought-provoking which is very nice. It's a pleasantly rebellious tone that gells nicely with the different elements of the story.

My only complaints would be to watch for missing commas, reign in a little of the capitalization, and to cite some of the poetry you use. Fix those little issues up, and this will be good to go.

Happy writing! :)

Texty Monster

Critics United

Wow... I really liked this. The ending was a bit abrupt, but it was an excellent read. Fantastic job.

I liked what you said in your first paragraph, that they were still all doomed. They were only different because they knew that they were doomed. That's deep.

I spotted some missing commas, but that was about it.

Bravo, this was a nice piece. It makes one think, just like Huxley's book. Cheers.

*Meltintalle