Well, I think you did okay with those reviews. :P

'Thunderfoot sweatdropped'? It's an anime thing. DON'T DO IT IN WRITTEN MEDIA ESPECIALLY IF THE CANON ISN'T EVEN ANIME.

Not a bad fic overall, though I'm still trying to work out why you had the pointless Ace/Sparx.

Sequel tomorrow? Goodie. :)

Lord Fear is NOT Jafar, I'm afraid. The ending came too quickly, I think, with a deus ex machina for the Lighting Knight Corps (and if all those battleships crashed, that's kinda a higher casualty list than the character's actions would suggest) and the miraculous recovery of Thunderfoot. (It's okay to kill off OCs. Really.)

And Ace/LI? I know, in canon they don't have THAT much interaction. But the point there is that they've been suddenly transported to the real world and starting to feelt the effects of hormones/emotions. You've merged gameverse and canonverse in an extremely clunky way. The relationship in this story only makes sense if one knows about them in canon, and that's not good; if you're writing AU and starting a storyarc from the beginning, make that storyarc plausible within the story. So relationships weren't meant to be the focus of your story? So leave them out. I wouldn't have got on your case for making gameverse!LI an evil **. Also, the slight Sparx/Ace subtext back in chap 5 or so went nowhere--what was with that, anyway?

Okay, interesting story, a couple of decent OCs. Congratulations on finishing it.

O, very, very good ending. I like how you had Lord Fear falling apart and using his bits and pieces to attack. And having the amulet in his chest was very apt too. I could see that sort of thing happening in a video game. I like, and your writing is getting better too :)

“Mother?” cried Blackout in terror, his eyes bulging out behind his shades.
What the? Now that is funny!

Nice ending Wile. :) So it's all over now? Sniff... shame... Interestng come abck ,though I think perhaps the story could voerall have been logenr and you coud have done with making up more of the lines yoruself, this, for a first ALF fanfic, is not half bad. My congrats to you.

Hi there :) You know I'm still noticing that a great deal of these lines are being taken from the actual TV show. Is that a good idea? I mean it's all very well and good if you'r just doing a write-up of the TV show and there's nothing wrong with using these lines, but perhaps it might be better if you thought of more of them yourself and made it more your work than stuff taken from the series. We already know that you can write.

And one more thing, I dunno about that last line... funny, yeah but is it really Sparx? I can't pciture it somehow. Maybe that's just me but... no.

Anyways, nit picking aside, I am enjoying. Lord Fear's new form is extremely interetsing and you have given a purpose to the amulet that I wasn't expecting. Pleae keep it up, looking forwards to the next bit, so make the final fight a real humdinger, 'kay?
Scarab.

O NICE! Turbo-evil-dragon-Lord Fear. Now that is cool. You described him very well, I got this full on really cool mental picture. I can see the next chapter is going to be good. Write! More! :D

Aside from the last bit, this was virtually a transcript of episode 26. I don't mind transcripts and I don't mind judicious quoting from canon, but this is going a bit too far. Interesting idea with the dragon though, if a tad Aladdin-influenced.

Your "waist" refers to one's midriff. X has a slender WAIST and long legs.

Your "waste" refers to trash, rubbish, etcetera. One's WASTE may be what one deposits in the toilet on a regular basis.

Confusing the two generally results in hilarity and/or disgust.

Yay. Nice chap (mostly because it has Random in it) I like the bible basher bit, plus Sparx and Lancelot fighting was very cool. Aerial battles rock. Interesting having Thrasher as what makes the shields go spinning instead of just the wind.

Wow, dramatic... sniff... I'm not crying honestly.
Speaking of which would Randomn cry? As messed up as he is that might be a bit too far.
And as good as this is, you do tend to take a lot of lines from the television series, which is fine, but maybe if you made up some of your own?
All the same please keep writing. This is enjoyable and things just started to get very interesting.

Interesting chapter. :)

Umm, keep updating?

Flash.

Not bad. :)

What is "a mutation spiders"?

"pretty easy"? Lord Fear uses more formal syntax. "Relatively simple"?

You don't need to extensively describe canon characters such as Googler. While descriptive writing is good, when a) we already know what a character looks like and b) you don't actually USE any truly beautiful descriptive imagery, it becomes pointless. The stages of good writing tend to go from "hardly any description and badly spelled" to "over-the-top description and reasonably well written" and "the very well-written and happy mean", I believe.

Sire? That's for kings, I believe. Sir is for superiors.

Watch commas, closing dialogue tags, and runon sentences. "Speech usually finishes with a comma," I say.

Ace/Sparx? Look, he's NOT obsessed by anything with breasts. Now, I know that it's possible to overreact to 'shippy hints, but I think your subtext is VERY clear in this chapter, and since you put some of the far more canonical Ace/LI in the previous chapter, this just doesn't make sense. Either develop and rationalise relationships or leave them out altogether. And "lost in one's eyes" is a slightly overused and cliche device.

"Grabbed Sparx around the WASTE?" Eww. Eww, eww, eww.

"Hand over" is two words.

No, not bad at all, and quite interesting. The lists of attractions for the coming chapters are intriguing.

hi my name is allison. I liek your sotory so far but i would liker iiy if you would put sam adn David in it to I hope to hear from you soon

O. This was funny. Ace falling on Sparx was funny. The exploding robot was funny. "Exterminate" "Okay" If only it was so easy on Doctor Who... Poor Shockwave just seems to be hanging around to get hurt... Random next, yay! You gonna put that cool wierd statue in?

Nice chapter. I'm enjoying this, looking forwards to the next bit. You seem to be quotin from the episodes quite a bit, but all the same you're quite IC. Keep it up.

“Exterminate!” the robot droned.' there. :P

Interesting chapter. Ace seems to have a soft spot for every woman he touches. :S

I liked the 'Pretty Boy' line, don't know why, exactly, I just did.

I've been enjoying this fic, so keep updating. :)