Well this certainly isn't what you first lead us to believe... and thats a good thing. You seemed to take a bit of time in the early going to find your feet, but as the storys has gone on, you've rapidly inproved with each step along the way. Your main weakness seems to have been the characterisation, which is admitably more difficult than one might think. Since as with Kim and Ron, a writer is forced to always be on their toes with the constant quips and jokey banter. Which in here only has it's moments and is very low key. You seem to give off the inpression that the trademark carefreeness and constant light stabilitie in the face of anything, which made the KR dynamic so special, is something that possibly dosen't come as natural to you personaly as say characters who are far more introspective and serious natured. However, if so, then you do kind of manage to turn that to your advantage anyway, once the story took such a dark turn. Your style seemed to fit much better with the change in tone and you've managed to build on your strenghs and thus develop the maturity of the characters. Also as others have said, fair play to you, for having the guts to not shy away from the perfectly normal problems that every couple must face. Indeed the road to lasting realationships is driven by hard work and while theres the occastional over dramaticness, you've generaly kept it well within reason and lets face it, in some cases it's even envitable, considering the setting the fic takes place at, after all the sheer giddyness of first young love is to some extent naturely annoying to more jaded experienced outside observers of course.

I must admit to before having read this, being completely ignorant of the mythos your playing around with, but all the same, no matter how confusing things got, I still found it all weirdly compelling so your clearly doing your job right. It's powerfully creepy and disturbing stuff, indeed but the tweenieboppers to bed folks! Heh. But it's also very interesting and has obviously wonderfully kept your readers in the dark as to how things will unfold from one moment to next and thats good engaging writeing.

I'd defenetly say that your main strengh lies in plot. This is certainly a very complictated and well thought out story, with a lot of depth to it.

In closing, you've created a fairly accurate looking depiction of what the KP verse would be like when freed from the protection of the forces of Disney and faced with the reality of it's first true evil. Almost like what KP might be like if the show had somehow been moved from Disney to HBO.

Very intresting story. Your a great writer! Well just to let you know I think your doing great and I can't wait for an update. Do so soon please!

Was not sure at first, really it seemed to be nothing more than a pure attempt at a love fic...But finally getting through it all, I could not stop reading...Every line, each word soon came to life in front of the screen, and you have done amazingly so far...With interesting turns and even more questions being rasied, I am holding myself on edge waiting for more...

hey i reads this story quite a while ago plz update soon

I like this story. I can't wait for you to finally update. There are a lot of stories out there that don't recognize how the differences between Kim and Ron would effect the relationship. All couples fight, and you have done a good job in showing that in the earlier chapters.

The latest chapter was also very well written. Something as terrible as a room of blood and death would have a huge impact on anyone, and I like that you showed Kim to be no exception. Plus the added suspense and mystery at the end was a nice touch.

Please update soon. I'm looking forward to seeing where this story leads.

Sorry I have not reviewed till now, I have been following your story for some time though. Really great beginning, please continue when you get a chance!

CUTE- love it.

wonderful chapter as to be expected. As to the Lillith myth, Don't worry. Interpret it how you wish. If I don't agree with it that just means that I see it differenty (Probably from using it differently in a game or story before.) That doesn't make your view of it any less valid, or good. I couldn't get mad or angry at your interpretation (I have no investment in the mythos except how it fits into my veiwpoint), just that I don't agree with how it is used in your story. But this is your story, not mine, and that means that your interpretation, for the story is correct.

Hm...every story needs a mysterious "she." I nice little hanger there in the last, oh, 6 paragraphs or so. Good job on this chapter! Very...very...captivating!

Very, very, very awesome. The conversation between Kim & her mother seems just very well-characterised.

I love it. It's all quite appropriate - everyone's in character and it's keeping me wanting more.

"Welcome back to my ongoing argument with the whole wide world."- Max Kellerman

A fairly decent chapter. Hmm, Hotaru’s not going too pleased with the situation. You gotta pity the villain who did this. Once the Ring Wraiths have said villain, they will take the villain back to the Underworld to be tortured by Hotaru. Ann? Now that’s a first. In most fics, Mrs. Possible’s name is Andrea. Personally I would’ve gone with Leslie. How about Doctor P squared. Nuts, wanted to find out happens next.

It is a really fantastic song. In my opinion, it’s better than the Beatles did Post-Revolver, aside from Penny Lane/Strawberry Fields Forever.

Fun fact: Contrary to public knowledge, unless you’re a Procol Harum fan, the drummer on AWSoP is not a member of the band. In fact he’s a studio musician. While it was common practice to use them, it was different in the case of PH. When the song was first recorded officially, the band was in between drummers. The initial recording had some guy named “Tommy Downs” real name forgotten. Producer Denny Cordell didn’t like “Tommy”, but he had already split. However at the time of the booking of the session the band didn’t have a drummer.

The day of the recording they had a drummer all lined up in one Bobby Harrison, but when they got to the studio they found that Cordell had brought in Bill Eyden. Eyden was used that day because he already knew the song having heard the demo, and Harrison didn’t.

Keep up the good work.

Cool story! can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter (update soon Plz)

This is getting intense! I keep wanting to pull back, worried about what will happen next, but find myself reading on and on.

Glad you pointed out that Barkin is the only teacher at MHS. Perhpas that's because of budget cuts ...

Uh oh...do I sense some disaster ahead for our heroes? This was an excellent chapter; totally covered Kim's reaction there! Man oh man: please continue!

“And so it was that later, as the miller told his tale, that her face, at first just ghostly, turned a whiter shade of pale”- Text by Keith Reid, Music by Gary Brooker, MBE and possibly by Matthew Fisher; from the song "A Whiter Shade of Pale" by Procol Harum

Gruesome chapter. Well, that’s one way to shut up Kim. Wow who knew that Drew and Shego could be so gruesome. No, wait Drew’s dead, can’t be Shego. I mean sure she dislikes Drakken, but I don’t think she’d go that far. Gee there’s a surprise, but then again I always knew you were cracked. What people?

Keep up the good work.