Reviews for Shattered Mind

Reviews For: Shattered Mind - Reviews: Page 1 of 3

gaap237 2007-10-23 ch 6,	abuseIt was awesome
zookitty 2007-06-16 ch 1,	abuseIntriguing first chapter. I am eager to read more I love Bridge so much! and the way you write him is awesome! keep up the great work -zooky-
gaap237 2007-04-23 ch 2,	abuseHey!! I loved this story. You've got to write more about our favorite psychic. He's the best, so are you. please, please, please write another one like this one gaap237
MistressHawk 2006-05-16 ch 2,	abuseQuickly, before I get any further in the story : You need a beta reader. No offense or anything, because you have some great ideas and your writing isn't horrible or anything like that, but you're a bit like Bridge in that you don't seem to quite be able to get things out without babbling. Chapter One had a lot of run on sentences that could be reworked to make more sense ( and flow better ), and you've got a fair share of "wrong" words, such as "to" ( as in 'go to the store' ) vs. "too" ( as in 'too much work' ). If you can't find anyone else, I could probably manage to work through some of it, but it would really help an otherwise great (so far) story.
Buffyxenaman 2005-10-14 ch 1,	abusegood job
Buffyxenaman 2005-09-18 ch 6,	abuseit was a great beyond words stroy. Bridge is my favorite chacter on the show thanks for dong a stroy about me. Keep up the good work.
Psycho Tangerine 2005-08-15 ch 4,	abuseHi, I am really enjoying this story. I don't understand why Bridge wasn't ordered to stay behind since this monster is so harmful to him. Cruger could've joined the battle instead. But please do something about your long paragraphs. It makes the story difficult to read.
BloomingViolets 2005-07-11 ch 7,	abuseFirst of all I'd like to say, Excellent Story! I loved how you portrayed Sky's and Bridge's friendship, it was very well done! And I loved the fact that you had Sky and Syd as a couple squeals It was nice to see Z accepting that she and Bridge could never be physical -very heart warming! can't wait for your next fic!
MzDany 2005-07-10 ch 6,	abuseVery,very nice! I especially liked Bridge's 'weakest Ranger' speech and the way everyone stood up for him with their various arguments. A very nice bonding moment. Excellently written! The fight scene was intense, and you brought out both the mental and the physical struggle very well! Great job! Dany
Weesta 2005-07-10 ch 7,	abuseWoohoo! A fic by you and Dany? I'm looking forward to it already! You did a really nice job establishing Z's feelings for Bridge, and I like her observations of Bridge in the park before she goes to talk to him. Poor Bridge! You really explain the hardships he faces with his unique powers very well. It's just so sad! You did a lovely job with Z's acceptance of what will obviously be huge obstacles in her relationship with Bridge. Very sweet ending. Well done!
Weesta 2005-07-10 ch 6,	abuseReally nice conversation with Sky and Syd - and I love how Cruger interrupted, but then stayed to chat with them - nice. I loved Bridge's reaction to S/S as a couple too. Cute! When Bridge talks about himself as the "weakest link" and then Sky and Syd, then Jack and Z step in to correct him - I loved that whole section. Sweet moment with Sky and Bridge at the end. Just a format nitpick - I know I've mentioned this before, but I have a really hard time reading your fics becaue everything runs together in huge paragraphs. I know the final results will be much longer, but I think it'd be so much easier to read if you broke paragraphs and diologue down into separate sections.
garnetred 2005-07-10 ch 7,	abuseExcellent story. I am soo glad that Z and Bridge are together. They are such a cute couple. Please write soon.
the real vampire 2005-07-10 ch 7,	abuseAww that was so cute!! Poor Bridge - reminds me of Rogue from the X-Men a bit!! Great job and am lookig forward to your next story!!
princess moon shadow 2005-07-09 ch 7,	abuseLove it!
princess moon shadow 2005-07-09 ch 6,	abuseLove it!

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