HAHAHAHAHAHAH MASQURADE BALL LAMO . YOU ARE STUPID BECAUSE MAY IS NOT GAYS SISTER LAMO HAHAHAHAHA

While the writing is okay, I do agree with Facia. This fic would work out a lot better as an original fic. Not only because Pokemon are barely mentioned but also because the characters are ooc.

not bad! really liked it. may and ash are so cute together.

Um...isn't this basically original fiction? It mentions pokemon but doesn't really have to do with it.