Reviews for Remember Me - FanFiction.Net

Reviews For: Remember Me - Reviews: Page 1 of 3

Aries Zodiac 2006-02-24 ch 14,	abuseHmm...I don't know. I liked the basic premise but the writing- especially in the earlier chapters was sketchy and not very well laid out which makes it hard to read but is offputting. Tenses! Aargh! I've read so many fics where people have mixed up past and present tense that I get a bit edgy on the subject! For instance: "Greg rubbed his eyes. Ever since he switched to the graveyard shift, he hasn't gotten much sleep recently" You go from having all your dialogue squished into a wadge (like "Ah!" He screamed a little. " Hey Greggo!" " Nick, you scared thehell outta me!" in chapter one to " We gotta find them!" Replied Sara. " Did you check the basement!" Yelled Warrick. " No!" Also 'replied' suggests she's answering someone elses comment, whereas you've used it a couple of times to star a conversation. And the R shouldn't be capitalised. Same with 'Yelled'- it's part of the same sentence. "The team all screamed with Joy." asides from the capitalised J, it's a bit OOC. I'm sorry, but I can't see Sara, Warick or Grissom screaming with joy, especially when their trying to complete a rescue. How did Jenna survive ten years being held by a fruitcake who regularly beat her up- quite badly from the sounds of it? Why didn't he use her to get revenge earlier- it seems rather unlikely he'd have kept her for ten years. I'm sorry if I've been a bit ** you- I liked the fic otherwise- there were some great lines, like in Chapter 1 with the Nick/Greg interaction. But I just think that (stylistically mainly) your writing needs a bit of going over. Otherwise- keep writing! AZ
Frodo1512 2005-12-24 ch 12,	abuseAww man...what a place to end the story...I'ts so good, i think i might go crazy if you don't update soon! It's really good!
Eshlyn Kar 2005-12-04 ch 12,	abuseWhat I have to wait till you update. But it has been a month, more than a month you HAVE to update. Leaving people like that is a crime you cant do that! Can you? I will have to consult the rules... NO! YOU CANT! lol jk but still you have to update like as fast as you possibly can i think i might just die if you dont! I love this story SO MUCH! Elyse Rozema
MerryPippinLuver 2005-10-16 ch 12,	abuseAttention Readers! This is the Author! I separated the chapters before I posted it, but somehow it got put together. If you have any ?'s just put it in your review. Hope you enjoy it! It's really good!! ~Jamie
ChernobylGhost 2005-09-28 ch 11,	abuseMore, please!!
Korilian 2005-09-22 ch 1,	abuselooks interesting, but try to fix your formatting. Putting some space between different character's lines, makes it a lot easier to read and might nab you more readers.
Hieiz PyroKitty 2005-09-18 ch 11,	abuseNO DONT STOP NOW! >< pleaase hurry up! poor greggo hugglesgreg >
InuIceWolf 2005-08-27 ch 10,	abusei loved it Please update soon
InuIceWolf 2005-08-08 ch 8,	abusethis story is asome. i cant wait to find out what happens to Greg and Jenna. i hope the rest of the team finds them in time.
red lighting 2005-07-25 ch 8,	abuselove it
GreggoAddict 2005-07-23 ch 8,	abuseahh good chapter! lol, of course ill keep updating. I think my story only has like one more chapter left to go. That kinda stinks but hopefully i'll be able to write a new one. I'm such a sucker for kidnap fics lol. Great work Love Jackie
linschickrule101 2005-07-23 ch 8,	abuseoh poor grego! update soon, please!
Cheelalaucha 2005-07-22 ch 8,	abuseGeez, can't the team (and Greg also) katch a break once and a while? -Sigh- I'm hopin' for the best, and I wanna see if the team find out about Greg's reason for going out in the first place. I'll keep on readin' ta find out, but don't wait too long to update again. :-) ~Tilly
lovesdigsdmanded 2005-07-21 ch 7,	abusethat was what i was waiting for. the part were greg gets really hurt.
Cheelalaucha 2005-07-20 ch 7,	abuseAhh, more of our great Greggo is what I need! Loved the new chapter & keep 'em comin', please! ~Tilly

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