Hm... well sorry to say, but the Kat character screams Mary-Sue. However, overall, the story was pretty nicely done. I know that it's very hard to write in first person... darn you Robert Louis Stevenson... but I can see the effort you put in to stay true to Jim's character.

I know it may be difficult, but you should probably refrain from giving so much detail about what characters are wearing. I know you want to give an accurate description, but in the books, Jim usually only supplies a couple of major details. Remember, he is boy. ^_^

Also, make sure to double space between your paragraphs. When everything is so crammed together, it's very difficult to read.
I'm looking forward to seeing more of this story, so write on!

yay! i like it very much so far, but now you have to continue and, hopefully,finish it!
very nice start so far, i was quite disappointed that it only had one chapter right now. keep writing!

Are you going to finish the story or just leave it hanging like that?