Hi Im wounded and walking you are my writing hero and this story is magnificent you should write more like this, id like to get to know you and i would really apreciate it if you commented on my storys they'll be released 16th july 2009 under the name of Lorat(working title)you can email me at thanks and bye

this story is really good, however, you might want to simplify the way certain characters talk, like jak, why use beloved, and not girlfriend, it would tie in to what he said earlier. but i must say, it would make a great game. in fact i went to play it, and when i got to the metal head base in haven i felt bad for killing them

His this is an after the fact review but I must say I enjoyed this story.

Wonderfully written!
The way they speek,i can really hear them saying it.
Reading this fic is like watching the cutscenes from Jak4...
Honestly,i told a Jak-loving friend of mine about this and the guy thought (spell?) it was the script of the next game...

BTW,could those prowlers be loosely based on Alien?
I was trying to portray them,and those guys jumped to vision...

*Claps* Wow, I must say that is for sure an instant favourite of mine. This fic was very well done.

Firstly, I want to focus on Frost. This character was definitely a great addition to the story and you did a good job filling him out as a character. Too many stories throw in their side-characters merely to just have them there, never really giving them much thought. Frost, on the other hand, is a character that the reader can really like in the beginning, and then sympathize for after the accident and then like all the more.

Secondly, Seem. I give you props for taking her character and turning it upside-down. This was one of the driest (if not the most so) character in Jak 3, and you did a good job of making her take a more central role to the story. Her transformation was a nice touch, too, along with going into detail of her beliefs.

Thirdly, bringing Maia back. A job well done with making it flow smoothly with the plot. Bringing her back with her lust for vengeance was good, but also making her feel trapped, giving her that internal conflict was a good spin on it.

Next, the Darken. Kudos for taking the time to really go into depth with them. Again, I always hate to have a third wheel in the story, just thrown in for the helluvit.

Finally, just a quick comment. Excellent work in making sure that none of the characters took a back seat to the others, as too many fics will focus so intensely on one group and only come back to the other group once in a blue moon.

In closing, excellent work, and I sincerely hope that you might go ahead with a sequel to this story, as you are set up perfectly for one, what with Maia's life change and Frost and Seem settling down together, as well as your developments with the other couples. Your writing is terrific, and I hope to see more Jak and Daxter stuff in the future, as I'm a big fan of the franchise. Happy writing!

~Chantz

I LOVED this story. I am a huge Jak and Daxter fan and enjoyed every second of this.

Oh I loved it. All the fluff and sweetness at the end just made me wanna draw hearts and smileys all over the place. (scary thought) But seriously it's great. I loved every moment of it and I'm so glad I was able to finally read it all. This is a story that I will read over and over again and always remember. There was not a moment where your description failed to create the story in my mind or where I was dissapointed. This story was full of every genre and at the end so heart warming and had closure. Loved it. My only complaint which isn't really such a big thing was that you seem to use the word "flare" alot, not that it's a bad word because I thought it was a clever one that I've never thought of myself, however just be careful not to overuse a word whether it's that one or another. I myself have that problem too Lol. Other than that my only other complaint is that it's over. ::sobs:: All good things must come to an end I guess. ^^

Right now I LOVE you to bits because of all the wonderful fluff in "fulfillment". This chap was so wonderful and I am truly so happy for Seem and Frost. I love this pairing!

The fluff, gotta luv the fluff. Jak pecking Keira on the cheek, so cute. ^^ Action, drama, humor, angst and now fluff, your story has it all.

LOVE IT! Been hooked to this story ever since I discovered it yesterday! I was even reading it at work when I had free time. Shame on me. I liked that part too. I really never paid much attention to Seem or got attached to her character but this story is making me love her and the idea of a pairing with Frost, light and dark. Frost is the best OC I've ever read about and he's officially the man. Lol ok back to the reading. Once again your writing is beyond words.

WOW! ::jaw hanging:: This story was recommended by a fellow reader and fan of my stuff and she said I just HAD TO READ this story and you know what, I'm glad she told me and I'm glad I started reading it. I'm only up to chap 2 and your description is great! I love how you've worded everything from the way they talk about their military plans to the excitement in the race. I really feel like I'm there and all this is really happening! I'm guessing this takes place between Jak3 and Jak X? Either way it's really good, so good I've added it to my faves without having to read the rest of it yet. My only peeve is sometimes your sentences can run on when you're describing alot so you'll say bla blah blah (comma) blah blah (comma) blah blah (comma)...you get the point so sometimes there's like a 6 or 7 comma long sentence. Still it's great and I love it. Talented and now I'm addicted. Time to read more! ^^

I've finally finished reading this story! I LOVE IT! Why don't you try and submit it to Maughty Dog for their next game? That'd make a really good ending!

i am amazed, absolutely amazed, i havent seen such brilliant writing since J.R.R Tolkein, and idont know what makes you think some of your chapters are small, most authors on ths site just do 3 or 4 paragraphs and be done with it, it is an amazing story, even though ive only read up to chapter 7 i can anticipate the rest being just as good, i thoroughly congratulate you, if it was in the shops, i would buy it, even if it was £50.00.

This story is awesome. I love it...and i agree, "Effective control..." Worked perfectally for Daxter's up-coming wisecrack, (I knew that was coming, I'm psyco.) Anyway, like i said, and you can quote me too, ABSOLUTELY AWESOME!

Dude, totally cool story. Frost is like so cool man. I just thought of the same idea of light and dark mixing. Well, except it's wihin Jak. But, you should check my story out, it's called "An Angelic Demon, A Demonic Angel."