i love your story=] nice job!

very nice! I like it. I readthe whole thing, although I only reveiwed this chapter. It's a cute little read, short, but very to the point. The thoughts and such, unfourtunatley, gets a little repetitive in the alternative parts, but thats a small grip. No more updates? Meh, it still rocks.

so cute! yay first chapter!

i loves it do more please

AwEsOmE oNeShOtS!
YeAh... SoRrY i'M hOoKeD oN TyPiNg LiKe ThIs...
Kay, I'll give you a break. :) But I loved your stories. I like how you make Shika fall into a sand pit lol :)

wait...if it's sasunaru...that means you like...yaoi's...? 0.o NO!

cool...they're actually thinking the same thing...yup yup

**nods* Very cute indeed, if not a wee bit short. o.0; I have a few things I would like to point out, though.

1) No, I’ve some weeks off and instead of staying home, I decided to visit the village where I did my first attempt to become a chuunin.
Really quick with this one; putting “I have” instead of “I've” would sound much better, and it would be advisable to switch ‘did’ with ‘made’, just to make it sound a bit better. Oh! And with “home, I”, there’s a semi-colon, not a comma.

2) Yes, simple they are and boring.
I have issues with this sentence, my dear. I am no expert on grammar, but I am being quite honest when I say that I highly doubt that is grammatically correct. If you will accept a suggestion, putting it like this: “Yes, simple they are—and boring.” or possibly, since that seems a bit weird as well, “Yes, simple they are, but they are boring as well.” makes it seem a little easier on the eyes for us grammar freaks. ^^;

3) May be I should had let him know after all. But it is already to late for that kind of thinking.
A few grammatical problems here; put “may be” as one word, change the “had” to “have”, and “to” should be “too”. Also, if I may, you might want to change the beginning of the second sentence a bit. Try “Either way, it is already far too late for that kind of thinking.” ^^; It sounds a bit prettier.

4) Why didn’t he say right away! I want to get up and kick his lazy **. But I can’t move.
Only a few things, instead of an exclamation point, you should put a question mark, or even a question mark followed by an exclamation point. And for the next part, separate “**” and “but” with a comma as opposed to a period. It is correct either way I believe, but it sounds better as one sentence.

5) Or stances are the same, including the handseal.
Two seconds for this; “or” should be “our”. ^^;

6) I blush, as he comes near to me.
First, omit the comma. Second, “as he comes near to me” just seems a bit odd. Try “as he comes nearer to me” or “as he comes near me.” I’d lean more towards the first one, but it’s your choice.

7) “Nope.” He says a little amused. “Not before I kissed you”
Whoo! Well, first thing is, the second part is quite messed up. First you need a period at the end of the sentence, and second, you either need to make it “Not before I've kissed you.” or “Not before I kiss you.” Either way works, it’s your choice entirely. Next, an issue that I myself had a while ago, “ “Nope.” He says a little amused.” It should be “ “Nope,” he says, a little amused.” When putting who says what after they say it, you put a comma—not a period.

^^;; Wow, there were more things I found that I wanted to go over… >> Eh, it works out. ^^ Either way, you get the sharp end of the stick, I get to sit here and type it out, you get this lovely constructive criticism and a way to improve your story. o.0 Also, I think this is the longest review I’ve written yet! *giggles* Almost an entire page in Microsoft Word! Yay, I feel accomplished. ^^ Nah!

Well, that just about sums up this rather lengthy review. Quite a cute read, I must say. I absolutely adore the idea of Shikamaru catching her shadow and then kissing her. o.0; I actually saw a picture like that once, Temari looked as if she was about to slaughter him. If she could move, that is. My compliments, I enjoyed it. Ja ne! --Judo

I'm honored that you acted upon my suggestion. That was a good chapter; it's only fair that Shika go through some trouble for his lady love...keep it up!

I think using Kage Mane to make someone kiss you would be pretty dumb, and I don't know why a girl like Temari would be into something like that because she's not a complacent woman.

Also, you run into a problem with height. We’ll say Temari’s taller (cause she’s older) so Shika has her walk up to him, and then he tilts his head up to kiss her… and so does she… the same with going on his toes or jumping. Even if they were the same height, their heads would turn the same way, meaning their noses would get in the way of the kiss probably…

But that’s just my view on the whole thing. Hope you don’t consider this a flame ^_^!!

I Loved the two chapters.

nice! there aren't enough skikaxtema fanfics out there! I'd say temari seems a bit ooc, I'd have thought she'd try to cover with a sneer/insult not outright yell but it's okay. Will you write more? tell me! how about one where temari catches him instead and kisses him? you know suprise the genius.

it's so cute! keep writing!