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| Ummster 2007-04-16 ch 1, | abuseThis is a good story, and you describe it well. You just need to edit for tenses and things like that. I do like this story though. :D |
| Sailor Star Mars 2005-11-25 ch 1, | abuse? ? ? ? ? really, this is confusing. Still, it is a good story. |
| MirrorrorriM 2005-10-16 ch 1, | abusekinda confusing..but i liked the way u put it. it was very fateful and mysterious. and thank u for reviewing my story. touya is a wimp cuz hes different. hes hiding behind his father from his sister and watching lame tv shows and all that. i just decided to make him a little bit different in this story. |
| Pathwarden 2005-09-20 ch 1, | abuseThis one I liked a tad better. There were some cases where your diction was a tad questionable, throwing off the intended mood for a moment. Sometimes it is really hard to find the words with the strength needed to lift a description from the mundane. I have gone through the same troubles. It helps to have a thesaurus handy in times like that. :P For what it is, a short scene, it is, in its entirety, done well. But it kills me seeing that this is a snippet of a story, not a full one. It leaves a reader wanting more. |
| X00001 2005-09-19 ch 1, | abusegreat chapter |
| tanaqui hollyoak 2005-09-19 ch 1, | abusehello you. i like this lots. the title seemed a little cliched until you read it in context, and then its all okay. and its nice! i like your style, like i said before. its a little darker in this story, (but its still cute xD) good work, you. / |
| Markus777 2005-09-19 ch 1, anon. | abuseI like it. Yuo do it very well so go on tath way. I intrested to know how look like the 200 ep. in figurative way. Please Update Soon! |
| aserene 2005-09-18 ch 1, | abuseWOW i love it! That was amazing! |
| Richforce 2005-09-18 ch 1, | abuseInteresting. |