No comment on the reviewing bit (Note: This is both the normal ego (the crazy one) and the alternate one (the sane one) talking)
(Normal Ego) Details, not enough details. This is before NEXT. This SHOULD be after Try somewhere.
One more thing, Lina and Gourry are NEVER EVER EVER EVER going to get killed that easy. After all (dreamy Lin voice) She still has good food to eat, more bandits to kill and steal from (down Lina. Calm down, No Dragon Slave. Its the truth, and it would be very unjust to lie. DO you remember what Amelia does with unjust people? She gives them (DUM Dum dum) JUSTICE SPEECHES)

(Alternate Ego) Uhh...right. Anyways, you need lots more detail, more privacy, and way more in characterness. My other ego has a point, Lina and Gourry getting taken down that easily is just as likely as, how would my normal ego put it. Its just as likely as Prince Phil (Normal Ego: Don't call him a prince in front of me.*Alternate Ego: SHUT UP OR GO TO YOUR ROOM)
Its just as likely as Phil (JUST Phil, happy now?*Yup) wearing a bright pink tutu and joining a circus.

Niether of my egos are very good with the difference between Flames and Constructive Criticism. But you need some work.

I thought it was kind of cute. There are few things yes that I would change, but over all I liked it.

Alandra: relax it is not a bad fic

Ramon: yeah, it has romance, and Drama. our kind of fic.

Maliska: and man, Amelia started to sound like Lina in the begining

Sunny: but one question still remains here. where did Rezo came from? was it another copy?

Alandra: you also love the slayers premium? cool, we have made a fic based on the last Slayers movie.