Well, that "damn Anissa Bitch!" sounds just fine to me. If you're going to leave a review, leave a correct one. This is HER story, HER one shot, which means she can do whatever the hell she wants.

If you don't like it, then here's a suggestion; Don't read it.

If your review is going to be rash, then make it constructive criticism like Javer did.

Anyways... I really enjoyed this One-Shot. X33 Hott and Spicy and.. Yum. :]

That was a SMOKING PILE OF CRAP! Shugo is not perverted and even though I hate him I doubt he would fall for that damn Anissa Bitch!

enough with the freakin Anissa all ready!I don't like this story.

Incredible for a first one-shot. The ending falls a little flat -- that is, it doesn't feel like an ending much at all -- but that's minor. To remedy this, try showing a single short action performed by any of the characters. A quick, hot glance passed between Shugo and Anissa, or Balmung clearing his throat, or something. Just as kind of a finisher. Don't end a story with a spoken line unless it's revealing some kind of new information or a twist.

I am VERY glad that on this one, you decided to actually place .hack characters in the .hack universe. If you want to use original characters, then this is the setting and company you want to use along with them. Makes it much easier to picture, IMO . . . And it makes the fic actually have to do with the series.

The make-out scene may be a touch too detailed. But then again, I haven't read many, so I'm no one to judge.