Not too bad, but I had a hard time picturing Keiko acting like that. Kurama seemed OOC too, and Karasu slightly. The grammar was ok, fortunately. This was a lot better than most of the fanfictions I've read. So, not bad.

I loved this idea. Very original to me and had me squealing in my chair :D

I can so see this happening. Karasu's supposedly gay, but this is so well-written, I think otherwise. Especially since I watch the Japanese version, I can almost hear Karasu saying those lines.

I admit, I haven't read something like this in a while-and certainly not with Karasu in it lol. I just wanted to make a comment about I cracked up when they were discussing immortality like AIDS.

Awesome! I love the way ypi portrayed Keiko! I love this!

Wow! I liked Karasu in this one for sure!

Good stating, please continue!

I wanna see if Karasu and kurama get together.

Love and kisses!

I know I just submited a review, but I can't seam to pull up chaptor 2 of your awsome story, did you move it or some thing?

Wow, your an awsome riter, I was looking for a good chase, and I defnatly found an awsome one, im going to read on, so far so good. :)

Hey, cool story so far. Went to the link with the other chapter. But, since I'm not 18 yet, I don't want to risk entering that site. So, could you email the rest of the story to me? Or if you're going to put the rest up on I'll wait 'till then. Please and thank you.

I like the story! Even though the pairing is unusual, to say the least... YOur writing skills are not bad...

Squee! Squee!

More.

I love it.

I love this story, update soon please. :)

when are you going to update Kuronue's Pendant?

This is a good story. I will go look for the rest of it. You are a good writer. I especially like Mind Links and Kuronue's Pendant. I can't wait for updates on those.

too bad you're not going to post the other two chapters, but that was an interesting start! keep up the good work, dark